When the King issued his proclamation every man in the kingdom who was not already a knight, straightway tried to contrive ways and means to kill the Pumpkin Giant.  But there was one obstacle which seemed insurmountable:  they were afraid, and all of them had the Giant’s Shakes so badly, that they could not possibly have held a knife steady enough to cut off the Giant’s head, even if they had dared to go near enough for that purpose.

There was one man who lived not far from the terrible Giant’s castle, a poor man, his only worldly wealth consisting in a large potato-field and a cottage in front of it.  But he had a boy of twelve, an only son, who rivaled the Princess Ariadne Diana in point of fatness.  He was unable to have a body-guard for his son; so the amount of terror which the inhabitants of that humble cottage suffered day and night was heart-rending.  The poor mother had been unable to leave her bed for two years, on account of the Giant’s Shakes; her husband barely got a living from the potato-field; half the time he and his wife had hardly enough to eat, as it naturally took the larger part of the potatoes to satisfy the fat little boy, their son, and their situation was truly pitiable.

The fat boy’s name was AEneas, his father’s name was Patroclus, and his mother’s Daphne.  It was all the fashion in those days to have classical names.  And as that was a fashion as easily adopted by the poor as the rich, everybody had them.  They were just like Jim and Tommy and May in these days.  Why, the Princess’s name, Ariadne Diana, was nothing more nor less than Ann Eliza with us.

One morning Patroclus and AEneas were out in the field digging potatoes, for new potatoes were just in the market.  The Early Rose potato had not been discovered in those days; but there was another potato, perhaps equally good, which attained to a similar degree of celebrity.  It was called the Young Plantagenet, and reached a very large size indeed, much larger than the Early Rose does in our time.

Well, Patroclus and AEneas had just dug perhaps a bushel of Young Plantagenet potatoes.  It was slow work with them, for Patroclus had the Giant’s Shakes badly that morning, and of course AEneas was not very swift.  He rolled about among the potato-hills after the manner of the Princess Ariadne Diana; but he did not present as imposing an appearance as she, in his homespun farmer’s frock.

All at once the earth trembled violently.  Patroclus and AEneas looked up and saw the Pumpkin Giant coming with his mouth wide open.  “Get behind me, O, my darling son!” cried Patroclus.

AEneas obeyed, but it was of no use; for you could see his cheeks each side his father’s waistcoat.

Patroclus was not ordinarily a brave man, but he was brave in an emergency; and as that is the only time when there is the slightest need of bravery, it was just as well.

The Pumpkin Giant strode along faster and faster, opening his mouth wider and wider, until they could fairly hear it crack at the corners.