Pleas. Perhaps, indeed, in the way of honour—­

Wood. Paw, paw! that word honour has almost turned my stomach:  it carries a villainous interpretation of matrimony along with it.  But, in a civil way, I could be content to deal with you, as the church does with the heads of your fanatics, offer you a lusty benefice to stop your mouth; if fifty guineas, and a courtesy more worth, will win you.

Pleas. Out upon thee! fifty guineas!  Dost thou think I’ll sell myself?  And at a playhouse price too?  Whenever I go, I go all together:  No cutting from the whole piece; he who has me shall have the fag-end with the rest, I warrant him.  Be satisfied, thy sheers shall never enter into my cloth.  But, look to thyself, thou impudent belswagger:  I will he revenged; I will. [Exit.

Wood. The maid will give warning, that is my comfort; for she is bribed on my side.  I have another kind of love to this girl, than to either of the other two; but a fanatic’s daughter, and the noose of matrimony, are such intolerable terms!  O, here she comes, who will sell me better cheap.

SCENE opens to BRAINSICK’S Apartment.

  Enter Mrs BRAINSICK.

Mrs Brain. How now, sir? what impudence is this of yours, to approach my lodgings?

Wood. You lately honoured mine; and it is the part of a well-bred man, to return your visit.

Mrs Brain. If I could have imagined how base a fellow you had been, you should not then have been troubled with my company.

Wood. How could I guess, that you intended me the favour, without first acquainting me?

Mrs Brain. Could I do it, ungrateful as you are, with more obligation to you, or more hazard to myself, than by putting my note into your glove?

Wood. Was it yours, then?  I believed it came from Mrs Tricksy.

Mrs Brain. You wished it so; which made you so easily believe it.  I heard the pleasant dialogue betwixt you.

Wood. I am glad you did; for you could not but observe, with how much care I avoided all occasions of railing at you; to which she urged me, like a malicious woman, as she was.

Mrs Brain. By the same token, you vowed and swore never to look on Mrs Brainsick!

Wood. But I had my mental reservations in a readiness.  I had vowed fidelity to you before; and there went my second oath, i’faith:  it vanished in a twinkling, and never gnawed my conscience in the least.

Mrs Brain. Well, I shall never heartily forgive you.

Jud. [Within.] Mr Brainsick, Mr Brainsick, what do you mean, to make my lady lose her game thus?  Pray, come back, and take up her cards again.

Mrs Brain. My husband, as I live!  Well, for all my quarrel to you, step immediately into that little dark closet:  it is for my private occasions; there is no lock, but he will not stay.