Trick. Your servant, till we meet again. [Exeunt severally.
SCENE II.—Mr WOODALL’S Chamber.
Mrs BRAINSICK alone.
Mrs Brain. My note has taken, as I wished: he will be here immediately. If I could but resolve to lose no time, out of modesty; but it is his part to be violent, for both our credits. Never so little force and ruffling, and a poor weak woman is excused. [Noise.] Hark, I hear him coming.—Ah me! the steps beat double: He comes not alone. If it should be my husband with him! where shall I hide myself? I see no other place, but under his bed: I must lie as silently as my fear will suffer me. Heaven send me safe again to my own chamber! [Creeps under the Bed.
Enter WOODALL and TRICKSY.
Wood. Well, fortune at the last is favourable, and now you are my prisoner.
Trick. After a quarter of an hour, I suppose, I shall have my liberty upon easy terms. But pray let us parley a little first.
Wood. Let it be upon the bed then. Please you to sit?
Trick. No matter where; I am never the nearer to your wicked purpose. But you men are commonly great comedians in love-matters; therefore you must swear, in the first place—
Wood. Nay, no conditions: The fortress is reduced to extremity; and you must yield upon discretion, or I storm.
Trick. Never to love any other woman.
Wood. I kiss the book upon it. [Kisses her. Mrs BRAIN. pinches him from underneath the Bed.] Oh, are you at your love-tricks already? If you pinch me thus, I shall bite your lip.
Trick. I did not pinch you: But you are apt, I see, to take any occasion of gathering up more close to me.—Next, you shall not so much as look on Mrs Brainsick.
Wood. Have you done? these covenants are so tedious!
Trick. Nay, but swear then.
Wood. I do promise, I do swear, I do any thing. [Mrs BRAIN. runs a pin into him.] Oh, the devil! what do you mean to run pins into me? this is perfect caterwauling.
Trick. You fancy all this; I would not hurt
you for the world. Come, you shall see how well
I love you. [Kisses him: Mrs BRAIN. pricks
her.] Oh! I think you have needles growing
in your bed.
[Both
rise up.
Wood. I will see what is the matter in it.
Saint. [Within.] Mr Woodall, where are you, verily?
Wood. Pox verily her! it is my landlady: Here, hide yourself behind the curtains, while I run to the door, to stop her entry.
Trick. Necessity has no law; I must be patient.
[She
gets into the Bed, and draws the clothes over her.