* * * * *

[Illustration:  The crime Wave.

ALI BABA repeating itself.  Forty thieves discovered at A London railway station.]

* * * * *

Matrimonial economy.

    “Travelling in a becoming suit of Copenhagen blue with hat to match the
    newly weds left on the Duluth train.”—­Canadian Paper.

* * * * *

    “She looked as Eurydice when her captor-King carried her away from
    earth and gave her instead the queenship of Hell.”—­"Daily Mail”
    Feuilleton.

Presumably Persephone had secured a decree nisi.

* * * * *

“These cowardly murders and attempted assassinations are abhorrent to the national mind, whatever its political views may be, and it will not seek to exterminate in any way the position of those who have any share in them.”—­Provincial Paper.

We still think extermination is the best thing for them.

* * * * *

A selfless party.

    ["They (the electorate) know that we (the Labour Party) are not, and
    never will be, merely concerned in the interests of one particular
    class.”—­Mr. THOMAS in “The Sunday Times."

“Nationalization was proposed not to gain increased wages for workers, but in the national interest....  They were prepared to produce to the last ounce of their capacity to give to the nation and to humanity all the coal they required.  If he thought that this scheme was intended to or would give the miners an advantage at the expense of the State he would oppose it.”—­Mr. BRACE, in the House of Commons.]

  Though Comrade Smillie keeps a private passion
    That yearns to see Sinn Fein upon its own,
  Clearly we cannot put our Unions’ cash on
    Men with a motto like “Ourselves alone;”
          To us all folk are brothers
  And on our bunting runs the rede, “For others.”

  Our hearts are ever with the poor consumer;
    We long to give his sky a touch of blue;
  To doubt this fact is to commit a bloomer,
    To falsify our record, misconstrue
          The ends we struggle for,
  As illustrated in the recent War.

  We struck from time to time, but not at Caesar,
    Not to secure the highest pay we could;
  Our loyalty kept gushing like a geyser;
    We had for single aim the common good;
          Who treads the path of duty
  May well ignore the cry of “Et tu, Brute!”

  Humanity’s the cause for which we labour;
    The hope that spurs us on to do our best
  Is “O that I may truly serve my neighbour,
    And prove the love that burns within my breast,
          And save his precious soul
  By a reduction in the cost of coal!”