“She could not speak for others, who
Had other thoughts; herself she knew;”
And so she brought me drink and food. 
After four days, the scouts pursued 100
Another path; at last arrived
The help my Paduan friends contrived
To furnish me:  she brought the news. 
For the first time I could not choose
But kiss her hand, and lay my own
Upon her head—­“This faith was shown
To Italy, our mother; she
Uses my hand and blesses thee.” 
She followed down to the sea-shore;
I left and never saw her more. 110

How very long since I have thought
Concerning—­much less wished for—­aught
Beside the good of Italy,
For which I live and mean to die! 
I never was in love; and since
Charles proved false, what shall now convince
My inmost heart I have a friend? 
However, if I pleased to spend
Real wishes on myself—­say, three—­
I know at least what one should be. 120
I would grasp Metternich until
I felt his red wet throat distil
In blood thro’ these two hands.  And next,
—­Nor much for that am I perplexed—­
Charles, perjured traitor, for his part,
Should die slow of a broken heart
Under his new employers.  Last
—­Ah, there, what should I wish?  For fast
Do I grow old and out of strength. 
If I resolved to seek at length 130
My father’s house again, how scared
They all would look, and unprepared! 
My brothers live in Austria’s pay
—­Disowned me long ago, men say;
And all my early mates who used
To praise me so—­perhaps induced
More than one early step of mine—­
Are turning wise:  while some opine
“Freedom grows license,” some suspect
“Haste breeds delay,” and recollect 140
They always said, such premature
Beginnings never could endure! 
So, with a sullen “All’s for best,”
The land seems settling to its rest. 
I think then, I should wish to stand
This evening in that dear, lost land,
Over the sea the thousand miles,
And know if yet that woman smiles
With the calm smile; some little farm
She lives in there, no doubt:  what harm 150
If I sat on the door-side bench,
And while her spindle made a trench
Fantastically in the dust,
Inquired of all her fortunes—­just
Her children’s ages and their names,
And what may be the husband’s aims
For each of them.  I’d talk this out,
And sit there, for an hour about,
Then kiss her hand once more, and lay
Mine on her head, and go my way. 160

So much for idle wishing—­how
It steals the time!  To business now.

* * * * *

MY LAST DUCHESS