[Mr. Punch cannot hold himself
responsible for the views expressed in
the following correspondence.]
The MALLABY-Deeley Emporium.
Dear Mr. Punch,—I want you to use your influence with that great philanthropist, Mr. MALLABY-Deeley. I know that he is too modest to claim to be a benefactor of the race, but I am at least right in calling him “Mr.,” for that is how he describes himself on his shop-window, and he would never have done that if he had not desired to avoid confusion with the common tradesman. Well, I want you to enlist his powerful sympathy in the cause of the struggling middle classes, to which body I belong. I refer particularly to our crying need for dinner-jackets at reasonable prices. I am one of those who spend their holidays at seaside hotels, where people make a point of dressing for dinner in the hope of giving their fellow-guests the impression that this is their daily habit in the home circle. In view of the early advent of Spring I approached my tailor, the other day, with inquiries as to the cost of an abbreviated dinner-suit. His prices were as follows:—jacket L10 10s. 0d.; waistcoat L3 3s. 0d.; trousers L4 10s. 0d.; total L18 3s. 0d. I am old enough to recall the time when the most elite tailors of Savile Row charged no more than L10 10s. 0d. for a complete evening costume, uncurtailed.
I am all for the cheap supply of “gentlemen’s lounge-suits” for the so-called working-classes to lounge in. I know of no surer antidote to the spirit of Bolshevism. But let us not forget the claims of the middle classes, who are the backbone of the Empire. If Mr. MALLABY-Deeley cannot help us in the direction I have indicated, then let Mr. Kennedy Jones, on behalf of the Middle Class Union, put a hyphen to his name and open a shop for the sale of evening wear at demi-popular prices.
Yours faithfully,
SURBITONIAN.
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Dear Mr. Punch,—It would be a thousand pities if Mr. MALLABY-DEELEY’S beneficent scheme should fail for lack of advertisement. Could you not persuade your colleagues of the Press to publish from day to day the route of his car’s progress from his private residence (or the terminus from which he debouches) to his place of business, as in the case of the new Member for Paisley? My only fear is that the Coalition Government might be suspected of adopting the Wee Free methods of publicity for political ends; but this would surely be an unworthy suspicion in the case of a movement designed for the benefit not of a party, but of mankind.
Yours faithfully,
stage manager.
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The decline of learning.