“Twenty!” I gasped.

“Everyone over fifteen had the franchise,” said Charles calmly.  “Now mark you, the programme of the Opposition was very cunning.  They only proposed to reintroduce cigar and cigarette smoking.  Edward Oburn, the young leader, being a film actor, naturally smoked nothing but exquisite Havanas.  In this he had the support of the wealthier employers, but the enormous army of cigarette-suckers, male and female, was with him.

“But I don’t see how he proposed to cut down expenses,” I objected.

“He was going to tax the printing of all words over two syllables in length,” replied Charles.  “The Press of those days was not affected by the proposal, but a considerable revenue was expected from scientific books, high-brow novels and Socialistic publications.  Well, the Premiere, as I say, was a prey to sad reflections, when suddenly the chur-chur of a taxi—­”

“Aren’t you thinking of night-jars?” I said.

“Possibly I am,” he admitted; “it may have been a chug-chug.  Anyway, it threw a wide arc of light into the gloom and stopped at the door of No. 10.  A few moments later the door of the boudoir was flung open and the Chancellor of the Exchequer was announced.”

“What did she want?”

“She was a he this time, and had come to announce the inevitable—­the very thing that the Premiere was thinking about and fearing.  ’We must have the Bachelor Tax,’” he said.

“Now, the Bachelor Tax had been tried some twenty years before, but had failed, partly owing to the number of passive resisters who had had to be forcibly fed, and partly owing to the number of men who had shown substantial proof of recurrent rejections.  How were they to bring in a reasonable and satisfactory Bill?  After a long consultation, lasting several hours beyond midnight—­”

“Did the taxi go on chugging?” I asked.

“Shut up.  They decided eventually that if a bachelor made a written proposal and was rejected he was entitled to have his case tried before a jury of women, who should decide whether it was a reasonable offer and one that should normally have been accepted.  If they found that it was, he was to be exempt from further efforts.  The Bill was accordingly drafted, and carried easily, and the sequel no doubt you have guessed.  On the day after it became law the beautiful young Premiere received a neatly-typed offer of marriage from Edward Oburn.  They met; there was a scene of the utmost beauty and pathos; they became engaged, and the Coalition Government of the middle of 1950 began.”

“How long did it go on?” I inquired.

“Until the day of revolution,” said Charles pleasantly, refilling his foul old briar—­“the great day when Fleet Street ran with blood and the pipe-smokers put up barricades in the Strand, and Piccadilly became a reeking shambles.  Have you got a match?”

EVOE.

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