While laying at Monte Video there was on each side of us a French man-of-war, the officers of which were very amiably inclined, and many were the dinners and parties exchanged between us.

In those days the interchange of our respective languages was very limited on both sides, so much so, that our frantic efforts to understand each other were a constant source of amusement.  A French midshipman and myself, however, considered ourselves equal to the occasion, and professed linguists; so on the principle that in the ’land of the blind the one-eyed man is king,’ we were the swells of the festivities.

I remember on one occasion, when the birthday of Louis Philippe was to be celebrated, my French midshipman friend came on board officially and said, ’Sir, the first of the month is the feast of the King; you must fire the gun.’  ‘All right,’ said we.  Accordingly, we loaded our guns in the morning, preparatory to saluting at noon.  It was raining heavily all the forenoon, so we had not removed what is called the tompions (to my unprofessional reader I may say that the tompion is a very large piece of wood made to fit into the muzzle, for the purpose of preventing wet from penetrating).  To this tompion is, or used to be, attached a large piece of wadding, what for I never rightly understood.

Now it seems that those whose duty it was to attend to it had neglected to take these things out of the guns.

On the first gun being fired from the French ship we began our salute.  The French ships were close alongside of us, one on either side.  The gunner who fires stands with the hand-glass to mark the time between each discharge.  On this occasion he began his orders thus:  ‘Fire, port;’ then suddenly recollecting that the tompions were not removed he added, ‘Tompions are in, sir.’  No one moved.  The gunner could not leave his work of marking time.  Again he gave the order, ‘Fire, starboard,’ repeating, ‘Tompions are in, sir,’ and so on till half the broadside had been fired before the tompions had been taken out.  It is difficult to describe the consternation on board the French vessels, whose decks were crowded with strangers (French merchants, &c.), invited from the shore to do honour to their King’s fete.  These horrid tompions and their adjuncts went flying on to their decks, from which every one scampered in confusion.  It was lucky our guns did not burst.

This was a most awkward dilemma for all of us.  I was sent on board to apologise.  The French captain, with the courtesy of his nation, took the mishap most good-humouredly, begging me to return the tompions to my captain, as they had no occasion for them.  So no bad feeling was created, though shortly after this contretemps an affair of so serious a nature took place, that a certain coldness crept in between ourselves and our ci-devant friends.

It seems that there had been of late several desertions from the French vessels lying at Monte Video, great inducements of very high wages being offered by the revolutionary party in Buenos Ayres for men to serve them.  The French commander therefore determined to search all vessels leaving Monte Video for other ports in the River Plate—­a somewhat arbitrary proceeding, and one certain to lead to misunderstanding sooner or later.