my manuscript, and they succeeded in saving it, some
hours before I was required to deliver it up.
This new blow affected me most severely, I had flattered
myself with an honorable success by the publication
of my book: if the censors had in the first instance
refused to authorise its being printed, that would
have appeared to me very simple; but after having
submitted to all their observations, and made all the
alterations required of me, to learn that my work
was destroyed, and that I must separate my self from
the friends who had supported my courage, all this
made me shed tears. But I endeavored once more
to get the better of my feelings, in order to determine
what was best to be done in a crisis where the step
I was about to take might have so much influence on
the fortunes of my family. As we drew near my
habitation, I gave my writing desk, which contained
some further notes upon my book, to my youngest son;
he jumped over a wall to get into the house by the
garden. An English lady*, my excellent friend,
came out to meet me and inform me of all that had happened.
I observed at a distance some, gendarmes who were
wandering round residence, but it did not appear that
they were in search of me: they were no doubt
in pursuit of some other unfortunates, conscripts,
exiles, persons in surveillance, or, in short, of some
of the numerous classes of oppressed which the present
government of France has created.
* (Note of the Editor.) Uneasy at not seeing my mother
arrive, I took horse to go and meet her, in order
to soften as much as was in my power, the news which
she had to learn upon her return; but I lost myself
like her, in the uniform plains of the Vendomois,
and it was only in the middle of the night that a
fortunate chance conducted me to the gate of the chateau
where the rites of hospitality had been given to her.
I caused M. de Montmorency to be awakened, and after
having informed him of this new instance of the persecution
which the imperial police directed against my mother,
I set off again to finish putting her papers in safety,
leaving to M. de Montmorency the charge of preparing
her for the new blow with which she was threatened.
* Miss Randall.
The prefect of Loir and Cher came to require the delivery
of my manuscript: I gave him, merely to gain
time, a rough copy which remained with me, and with
which he was satisfied. I have learned that he
was extremely ill-treated a few months afterwards,
to punish him for having shewn me some attention:
and the chagrin he felt at having incurred the disgrace
of the emperor, was, it is said, one of the causes
of the illness which carried him off in the prime of
life. Unfortunate country, where the circumstances
are such, that a man of his understanding and talent
should sink under the chagrin of disgrace!