I went back to my tent and lay down for a season of retirement, endeavouring to gain resignation to any event.  I dreaded torture and desired strength of flesh and spirit.  My trial soon came.  The lieutenant called me out, and pointing to the gun that lay near by, asked if I was going to clean it.  I replied to him, that I could not comply with military requisitions, and felt resigned to the consequences.  “I do not ask about your feelings; I want to know if you are going to clean that gun?” “I cannot do it,” was my answer.  He went away, saying, “Very well,” and I crawled into the tent again.  Two sergeants soon called for me, and taking me a little aside, bid me lie down on my back, and stretching my limbs apart tied cords to my wrists and ankles and these to four stakes driven in the ground somewhat in the form of an X.

I was very quiet in my mind as I lay there on the ground [soaked] with the rain of the previous day, exposed to the heat of the sun, and suffering keenly from the cords binding my wrists and straining my muscles.  And, if I dared the presumption, I should say that I caught a glimpse of heavenly pity.  I wept, not so much from my own suffering as from sorrow that such things should be in our own country, where Justice and Freedom and Liberty of Conscience have been the annual boast of Fourth-of-July orators so many years.  It seemed that our forefathers in the faith had wrought and suffered in vain, when the privileges they so dearly bought were so soon set aside.  And I was sad, that one endeavouring to follow our dear Master should be so generally regarded as a despicable and stubborn culprit.

After something like an hour had passed, the lieutenant came with his orderly to ask me if I was ready to clean the gun.  I replied to the orderly asking the question, that it could but give me pain to be asked or required to do anything I believed wrong.  He repeated it to the lieutenant just behind him, who advanced and addressed me.  I was favoured to improve the opportunity to say to him a few things I wished.  He said little; and, when I had finished, he withdrew with the others who had gathered around.  About the end of another hour his orderly came and released me.

I arose and sat on the ground.  I did not rise to go away.  I had not where to go, nothing to do.  As I sat there my heart swelled with joy from above.  The consolation and sweet fruit of tribulation patiently endured.  But I also grieved, that the world was so far gone astray, so cruel and blind.  It seemed as if the gospel of Christ had never been preached upon earth, and the beautiful example of his life had been utterly lost sight of.

Some of the men came about me, advising me to yield, and among them one of those who had tied me down, telling me what I had already suffered was nothing to what I must yet suffer unless I yielded; that human flesh could not endure what they would put upon me.  I wondered if it could be that they could force me to obedience by torture, and examined myself closely to see if they had advanced as yet one step toward the accomplishment of their purposes.  Though weaker in body, I believed I found myself, through divine strength, as firm in my resolution to maintain my allegiance to my Master.