“Ah!  Neal, I know the tones—­there’s a shrillness in them not to be mistaken.  Farewell!  I must depart; you have heard the proverb, ’those who are bound must obey.’  Young Jack, I presume, is squalling, and I must either nurse him, rock the cradle, or sing comic tunes for him, though heaven knows with what a disastrous heart I often sing, ’Begone dull care,’ the ‘Rakes of Newcastle,’ or ‘Peas upon a Trencher.’  Neal, I say again, pause before you take this leap in the dark.  Pause, Neal, I entreat you.  Farewell!”

Neal, however, was gifted with the heart of an Irishman, and scorned caution as the characteristic of a coward; he had, as it appeared, abandoned all design of fighting, but the courage still adhered to him even in making love.  He consequently conducted the siege of Biddy Neil’s heart with a degree of skill and valor which would not have come amiss to Marshal Gerald at the siege of Antwerp.  Locke or Dugald Stewart, indeed, had they been cognizant of the tailor’s triumph, might have illustrated the principle on which he succeeded—­as to ourselves, we can only conjecture it.  Our own opinion is, that they were both animated with a congenial spirit.  Biddy was the very pink of pugnacity, and could throw in a body blow, or plant a facer, with singular energy and science.  Her prowess hitherto had, we confess, been displayed only within the limited range of domestic life; but should she ever find it necessary to exercise it upon a larger scale, there was no doubt whatsoever, in the opinion of her mother, brothers, and sisters, every one of whom she had successively subdued, that she must undoubtedly distinguish herself.  There was certainly one difficulty which the tailor had not to encounter in the progress of his courtship; the field was his own; he had not a rival to dispute his claim.  Neither was there any opposition given by her friends; they were, on the contrary, all anxious for the match; and when the arrangements were concluded, Neal felt his hand squeezed by them in succession, with an expression more resembling condolence than joy.  Neal, however, had been bred to tailoring, and not to metaphysics; he could cut out a coat very well, but we do not say that he could trace a principle—­as what tailor, except Jeremy Taylor, could?

There was nothing particular in the wedding.  Mr. O’Connor was asked by Neal to be present at it:  but he shook his head, and told him that he had not courage to attend it, or inclination to witness any man’s sorrows but his own.  He met the wedding party by accident, and was heard to exclaim with a sigh, as they flaunted past him in gay exuberance of spirits—­“Ah, poor Neal! he is going like one of her father’s cattle to the shambles!  Woe is me for having suggested matrimony to the tailor!  He will not long-be under the necessity of saying that he ’is blue-moulded for want of a beating.’  The butcheress will fell him like a Kerry ox, and I may have his blood to answer for, and his discomfiture to feel for, in addition to my own miseries.”