“How was that?” asked his master.  “Why, sir, I heard there was a fine, good-looking widow of that name, livin’ in Meeklenburgh street, where she keeps a dairy; and sure enough there I found her.  Do you undherstand, sir?”

“Why should I not, sirra?  What mystery is there in it that I should not?”

“Deuce a sich a blazer of a widow I seen this seven years.  I went early to her place, and the first thing I saw was a lump of a six-year-ould—­a son of hers—­playin’ the Pandean pipes upon a whack o’ bread and butther that he had aiten at the top into canes.  Somehow, although I can’t tell exactly why, I tuck a fancy to become acquainted with her, and proposed, if she had no objection, to take a cup o’ tay with her yestherday evenin’, statin’ at the time that I had something to say that might turn out to her advantage.”

“But what mystery is there in all this?” said his master.

“Mysthery, sir—­why, where was there ever a widow since the creation of Peter White, that hadn’t more or less of mysthery about her?”

“Well, but what was the mystery here?” asked the other.  “I do not perceive any, so far.”

“Take your time, sir,” replied Dandy; “it’s comin’.  The young performer on the Pandeans that I tould you of wasn’t more than five or six at the most, but a woman over the way, that I made inquiries of, tould me the length o’ time the husband was dead.  Do you undherstand the mysthery now, sir?”

“Go on,” replied the other; “I am amused by you; but I don’t see the mystery, notwithstanding.  What was the result?”

“I tell you the truth—­she was a fine, comely, fiaghoola woman; and as I heard she had the shiners, I began to think I might do worse.”

“I thought the girl called Alley Mahon was your favorite?”

“So she is, sir—­that is, she’s one o’ them:  but, talkin’ o’ favorites, I am seldom without half-a-dozen.”

“Very liberal, indeed, Dandy; but I wish to hear the upshot.”

“Why, sir, we had a cup o’ tay together yestherday evenin’, and, between you and me, I began, as it might be, to get fond of her.  She’s very pretty, sir; but I must say, that the man who marries her will get a mouth, plaise goodness, that he must kiss by instalments.  Faith, if it could be called property, he might boast that his is extensive; and divil a mistake in it.”

“She has a large mouth, then?”

“Upon my soul, sir, if you stood at the one side of it you’d require a smart telescope to see to the other.  No man at one attempt could ever kiss her.  I began, sir, at the left side—­that’s always the right side to kiss at and went on successfully enough till I got half way through; but you see, sir, the evenin’s is but short yet, and as I had no time to finish, I’m to go back this evenin’ to get to the other side.

“Still I’m at a loss, Dandy,” replied his master, not knowing whether to smile or get angry; “finish it without going about in this manner.”