Like most of his class, however, he seemed to be influenced
by that extraordinary anomaly which characterizes the
saints—that is to say, as great a reverence
for the name of the devil as for that of God himself;
for in his whole life and conversation he was never
known to pronounce it as we have written it.
Satan—the enemy—the destroyer,
were the names he applied to him: and this, we
presume, lest the world might suspect that there subsisted
any private familiarity between them. His great
ruling principle, however, originated in what he termed
a godless system of religious liberality; in other
words, he attributed all the calamities and scourges
of the land to the influence of Popery. and its toleration
by the powers that be. He was a big-boned, coarse
man, with black, greasy hair, cut short; projecting
cheek-bones, that argued great cruelty; dull, but
lascivious eyes; and an upper lip like a dropsical
sausage. We forget now the locality in which he
had committed the offence that had caused him to be
brought there. But it does not much matter; it
is enough to say that he was caught, about three o’clock,
perambulating the streets, considerably the worse for
liquor, and not in the best society. Even as
it was, and in the very face of those who had detected
him so circumstanced, he was railing against the ungodliness
of our “rulers,” the degeneracy of human
nature, and the awful scourges that the existence
of Popery was bringing on the land.
As it happened, however, this worthy representative
of his class was not without a counterpart among the
moral inmates of the watch-house. Another man,
who was known among his friends as a Catholic voteen,
or devotee, happened to have been brought to the game
establishment, much in the same circumstances, and
for some similar offence. When compared together,
it was really curious to observe the extraordinary
resemblance which these two men bore to each other.
Each was dressed in sober clothes, for your puritan
of every creed must, like his progenitors the Pharisees
of old, have some peculiarity in his dress that will
gain him credit for religion. Their features
were marked by the same dark, sullen shade which betokens
intolerance. The devotee was thinner, and not
so large a man as the other; but he made up in the
cunning energy which glistened from his eyes for the
want of physical strength, as compared with the Protestant
saint; not at all that he was deficient in it per
se, for though a smaller man, he was better built
and more compact than his brother. Indeed, so
nearly identical was the expression of their features—the
sensual Milesian mouth, and naturally amorous temperament,
hypocrisized into formality, and darkened into bitterness
by bigotry —that on discovering each other
in the watch-house, neither could for his life determine
whether the man before him belonged to idolatrous
Rome on the one hand, or the arch heresy on the other.