of his mind, and touched that subsoil of conscious
responsibility for creation, the realization that,
whether through love or through selfishness, the man
who brings a child into this terrible, squalid, glorious
world, is a creator, even as God is the Creator.
So Maurice, sitting at his desk that next day, answering
a client on the telephone, or making an appointment
to go and “look at a house,” was really
feeling in his heart—not love, of course,
but a consciousness of his own relation to that little
flushed, suffering body out in the contagious ward
of the hospital in Medfield. “Will he pull
through?” Maurice asked himself. It was
six years ago that, standing at the door of a yellow-brick
apartment house, with two fingers looped through the
strings of a box of roses, Jacky’s father had
said, “Perhaps it will be born dead!”
How dry his lips had been that day with the hope of
death! Now, suddenly, his lips were dry with
fear that the kid wouldn’t pull through—which
would be “tough on Lily.” His face
was stern with this new emotion of anxiety which was
gradually becoming pain; he even forgot how scared
he had been at the thought that Eleanor
might
have opened that telegram. “I swear, I
wish I hadn’t hurt his feelings about that cigar
stub!” he said. Then he remembered Eleanor:
“I could wring Lily’s neck!” But
Eleanor hadn’t opened the telegram; and Maurice
hoped Jacky would get well—because “it
would be tough on Lily” if he didn’t.
Thus he dismissed his wife. So long as Lily’s
recklessness had not done any harm, it was easy to
dismiss her—so very far had she receded
into the dull, patiently-to-be-endured, background
of life!
The Eleanor of the next few weeks, who seemed just
a little more melancholy and silent than usual, a
little more devoted to old Bingo, did not attract
his attention in any way. But when Edith came
in on the following Sunday, he had his wife sufficiently
on his mind to say, in a quick aside:
“Edith, don’t give me away on being sort
of upset last Sunday night, will you?” (As he
spoke, he remembered that swift kiss. “Nice
little Skeezics!” he thought.) But he finished
his sentence with perfect matter-of-factness:
“it was just a—a little personal worry.
I don’t want Eleanor bothered, you understand?”
“Of course,” said Edith, gravely
And so it was that in another month or two, with reliance
upon Edith’s discretion, and satisfaction in
a recovering Jacky, the track of the tornado in Maurice’s
mind was quite covered up with the old, ugly, commonplace
of furtive security. In the security Maurice was
conscious, in a kindly way, that poor old Eleanor
looked pretty seedy; so he brought her some flowers
once in a while; not as often as he would have liked
to, for, though he had more money now, eight weeks
of a private room in a hospital “kind o’
makes a dent in your income,” Maurice told himself;
“but I don’t begrudge it,” he thought;
“I’m glad the kid got well.”