“’Camp Wad-ne-go-gallup on the shores of Crisco Bay, Maine.  Facing that grandest of all oceans, the Atlantic.  Located among the best farms where fresh and wholesome food can be had in abundance’—­yes but is it had, my dear?  That’s the question.  Anyway, I don’t like the looks of the boat in the picture.  It’s too full of boys.”

“’Opossum Mountain Camp for Boys.  Unusual sports and trips’—­Ah, possibly condor stalking!  That certainly would be unusual.  But dangerous!  I’d hate to think of Junior crawling about over ledges, stalking condors.  And it says here that there is a dietitian and a camp-mother, as well.”

“Camp-mother?” Doris sniffed, “Probably she thinks she knows how to bring up children—­”

Just then Junior came in to announce that he had signed up for a job for the summer, working on the farm of Eddie Westover’s uncle.  So in view of this added income, I felt that I could afford a little vacation myself, and am leaving on July 1st for Camp Mionogonett in the foothills of the Rokomokos, “a Paradise for Manly Men.”

XXIV

ALL ABOUT THE SILESIAN PROBLEM

So much controversy has been aroused over Silesia it is high time that the average man in this country had a clearer idea of the problem.  At present many people think that if you add oxygen to Silesia you will get oxide of silesia and can take spots out of clothes with it.

A definite statement of the whole Upper Silesian question is therefore due, and, for those who care to listen, about to be made.

The trouble started at the treaty of Noblitz in 1773.  You have no idea what a perfectly rotten treaty that was.  It was negotiated by the Grand Duke Ludwig of Saxe-Goatherd-Cobalt, whose sister married a Morrisey and settled in Fall River.  The aim and ambition of Ludwig’s life was to annex Spielzeugingen to Nichtrauschen, thereby augmenting his duchy and at the same time having a dandy time.  And he was the kind of man who would stop at nothing when it came time to augment his duchy.

In this treaty, then, Ludwig insisted on a clause making Silesia a monogamy.  This was very clever, as it brought the Centrist party in Silesia into direct conflict with the party who wanted to restore the young Prince Niblick to the throne; thereby causing no end of trouble and nasty feeling.

With these obstacles out of the way, the greed and ambition of Ludwig were practically unrestrained.  In fact, some historians say that they knew no bounds.  Summoning the Storkrath, or common council (composed of three classes:  the nobles, the welterweights, and the licensed pilots) he said to them:  (according to Taine)

“An army can travel ten days on its stomach, but who the hell wants to be an army?”

This saying has become a by-word in history and is now remembered long after the Grand Duke Ludwig has been forgotten.  But at the time, Ludwig received nothing short of an ovation for it, and succeeded in winning over the obstructionists to his side.  This made everyone in favor of his disposition of Silesia except the Silesians.  And, as they could neither read nor write, they thought that they still belonged to Holland and cheered a dyke every time they saw one.