[Illustration]

  An’ wunst he clumbed on our back’fence
  An’ flop his arms an’ nen commence
    To crow, like he’s a hen;
  But when he failed off, like he done,
  He didn’t fool us childern none,
    Ner didn’t crow again. 
  An’ our Hired Man, as he come by,
  Says, “Tom can’t crow, but he kin cry.”

* * * * *

[Illustration:  “PORE PA!  PORE PA!”]

* * * * *

LITTLE DICK AND THE CLOCK

  When Dicky was sick
    In the night, and the clock,
  As he listened, said “Tick-
    Atty—­tick-atty—­tock!”
  He said that it said,
    Every time it said “Tick,”
  It said “Sick,” instead,
    And he heard it say “Sick!”
  And when it said “Tick-
    Atty—­tick-atty—­tock,”
  He said it said “Sick-
    Atty—­sick-atty—­sock!”
  And he tried to see then,
    But the light was too dim,
  Yet he heard it again—­
    And’t was talking to him!

  And then it said “Sick-
    Atty—­sick-atty—­sick
  You poor little Dick-
    Atty—­Dick-atty—­dock! 
  Have you got the hick-
    Atties?  Hi! send for Doc
  To hurry up quick
    Atty—­quick-atty—­quock,
  And heat a hot brick-
    Atty—­brick-atty—­brock,

[Illustration]

  And rikle-ty wrap it
  And clickle-ty clap it
    Against his cold feet-
      Al-ty—­weep-aty—­eepaty—­
  There he goes, slapit-
    Ty—­slippaty—­sleepaty!”

* * * * *

FOOL-YOUNGENS

  Me an’ Bert an’ Minnie-Belle
  Knows a joke, an’ we won’t tell! 
  No, we don’t—­’cause we don’t know
  Why we got to laughin’ so;
  But we got to laughin’ so,
      “We ist kep’ a-laughin’.

  Wind wuz blowin’ in the tree—­
  An’ wuz only ist us three
  Playin’ there; an’ ever’ one
  Ketched each other, like we done,
  Squintin’ up there at the sun
      Like we wuz a-laughin’.

  Nothin’ funny anyway;
  But I laughed, an’ so did they—­
  An’ we all three laughed, an’ nen
  Squint’ our eyes an’ laugh’ again: 
  Ner we didn’t ist p’ten’—­
      We wuz shore-’nough laughin’.

* * * * *

[Illustration:  “SQUINT’ OUR EYES AN’ LAUGH’ AGAIN”]

* * * * *

  “We ist laugh’ an’ laugh’, tel Bert
  Say he can’t quit an’ it hurt. 
  Nen I howl, an’ Minnie-Belle
  She tear up the grass a spell
  An’ ist stop her yeers an’ yell
      Like she’d die a-laughin’.

  Never sich fool-youngens yit! 
  Nothin’ funny,—­not a bit!—­
  But we laugh’ so; tel we whoop’
  Purt’-nigh like we have the croup—­
  All so hoarse we’d wheeze an’ whoop
      An’ ist choke a-laughin’.