it himself.  And now ’t was a knot of ribband for my dress, and himself fetch’d home broach and ear-rings for my Birthday Gift, saying in my ear no fairer woman’s face had gladded his eyes since he left home.  And by the clipt Hedge on a May night he kiss’d me.  Alas, oh blind high God, alas, alas!

’T was Wondrous to see how even the Servants did catch the Humour, they waiting upon me Marvelous ready.  Until came my dear Aunt, smiling sickly, and laying of her Hand upon my Sholder said she must speak for mine own Good.  Richard was but a young Man, wild & headlong, and I a fair Woman thrown in his Way in an empty betweenwhiles ere his own true love came.  See to it, Jessamine, says she, that a Boy’s short-liv’d Fancy makes not a mock of thee, at thy years, that should know better!

Mine Uncle ever twitt’d me for liking of Books, & laugh’d when I beg’d I might have my Chance of Becoming an Artist.  “What,” says he, “a Hynds woman painting of strange folks their faces?  Out upon thy notion, Jessamine!” And my Cozzens laugh’d and said, Ever did Gentlemen dislike a Learn’d Female.  Should have gotten me a good Husband this Ten Years since but for my Shrew’s Temper & Vanity of Books.

To cure me they did Cruelly bait me to Marry the Pursy Ninny that hath the Plantation beyond the Hopes, he that hath been Ogling of me for years.  Could scratch the Wretch his eyes Out!  Puffeth with his mouth in a way hateful to me & hath pig’s jowls.  Yet were all they fair mad I should marry me this Paragon.  Should have a home of mine Own, worthy a Lady.  Aye,—­and be out of the way, lest I lead Richard Astray.

Mine Uncle chid me for Ingratitude to God in that I stamp’d my foot and said No!  But Richard laugh’d at the idea of Jessamine wedding yon tun.  Quoth Richard, “Let Jessamine be, all of ye! she is meat for his masters.”  Freeman smil’d sourly, & shrug’d.  I love not Freeman, nor do I hate him overmuch though he call’d me “Madame Jezebel.”

And then came Emily home from Visiting of her Aunts in London Town.  And they made a Marriage between her and Richard, Richard that was mine.  He had lov’d me an they had let us be.  Once pledg’d, he had held fast to his word.  Nor would I, for his own Soul’s sake, have let him go.  There is none, none under the sun but me alone, was strong enough to have sav’d Richard.

’T is true, as men judge such things, his Conduct to me was but Gallant Pleasantry, such as Fine Gentlemen do show to Favour’d Ladies.  And he did Spare my Pride.  Never did he show by word or Deed, or admit to any, that I had car’d more Deeply than he.  But Emily knew.  I knew she knew.  Saw it in her Eyes, that look’d on me with Pity.  I will not brok that any mortal Woman shall Pity me!

Secretly I suffer’d, suffer’d so that a Burning fire crept & crept into my Brain and Stay’d, nor has left me, Day or Night.