A week passed, and “in the evening I visited Madam Winthrop, who treated me courteously, but not in clean linen as sometimes....  Juno came home with me...."[243b]

Again, several days later, he seeks the charming widow, and finds her “out.”  He goes in search of her.  Finding her, he remains a few minutes, then suggests going home. “...She found occasion to speak pretty earnestly about my keeping a coach:  ...  She spake something of my needing a wig...."[244]

Two days later when calling:  “...I rose up at 11 o’clock to come away, saying I would put on my coat, she offer’d not to help me.  I pray’d her that Juno might light me home, she open’d the shutter, and said ’twas pretty light abroad:  Juno was weary and gone to bed.  So I came home by star-light as well as I could...."[245]

The Judge was persistent, however, and called again.  “I asked Madam what fashioned neck-lace I should present her with; she said none at all"[246] Evidently such coolness chilled the ardor of his devotion, and he records but one more visit of a courting nature.  “Give her the remnant of my almonds; she did not eat of them as before; but laid them away....  The fire was come to one short brand besides the block ... at last it fell to pieces, and no recruit was made.”  The judge took the hint.  “Took leave of her....  Treated me courteously....  Told her she had enter’d the 4th year of widowhood....  Her dress was not so clean as sometime it had been.  Jehovah jireh."[247]

A little later he turned his attention toward a Mrs. Ruggles; but by this time the Judge was known as a persistent suitor, and one hard to discourage, and it would seem that Mrs. Ruggles gave him no opportunity to push the matter.  At length, however, he found his heart’s desire in a Mrs. Gibbs and, judging from his Diary, was exceedingly pleased with his choice.

III.  Liberty to Choose

It seems clear that the virgin, as well as the widow, was given considerable liberty in making up her own mind as to the choice of a life mate, and any general conclusions that colonial women were practically forced into uncongenial marriages by the command of parents has no documentary evidence whatever.  For instance, Eliza Pinckney wrote in reply to her father’s inquiry about her marriageable possibilities: 

“As you propose Mr. L. to me I am sorry I can’t have Sentiments favourable enough to him to take time to think on the Subject, as your Indulgence to me will ever add weight to the duty that obliges me to consult that best pleases you, for so much Generosity on your part claims all my Obedience.  But as I know ’tis my Happiness you consult, I must beg the favour of you to pay my compliments to the old Gentleman for his Generosity and favorable Sentiments of me, and let him know my thoughts on the affair in such civil terms as you know much better than I can dictate; and beg leave to say to you that the riches of Chili and Peru put together, if