PATIENCE.

Father Bernard.—­His patience was such as no circumstances, however offensive, could subdue.  One day he presented a petition in favour of an unfortunate person, to a nobleman in place; the latter being of a hasty temper, flew into a violent passion, said many injurious things of the person for whom the priest interested himself.  Father Bernard, however, still persisted in his request; and the nobleman was at last so irritated, that he gave him a box on the ear.  Bernard immediately fell at his feet, and presenting the other, said, “Give me a blow on this also, my lord, and grant me my petition.”  The nobleman was so affected by this humility, that he granted his request.

Philip, the second King of Spain, had once spent several hours of the night in writing a long letter to the Pope, and having finished it, gave it to his secretary to fold it up and seal it.  The secretary was half asleep, and instead of shaking the sand-bottle over it in order to dry it, he emptied that which contained the ink by mistake, so that all the ink ran out upon the letter and completely spoiled it; perceiving the accident, he was ready to drop with confusion, upon which the King quietly said:  “Well, give me another sheet of paper;” and then began to write the letter over again with great tranquillity.

POETS.

An Italian poet presented some verses to the Pope, who had not gone far before he met with a line too short in quantity, which he remarked upon.  The poet submissively entreated his holiness to read on, and he would probably meet with a line that was a syllable too long, so that the account would soon be balanced!

A certain Italian having written a book on the Art of making gold, dedicated it to Pope Leo X., in hopes of a good reward.  His holiness finding the man constantly followed him, at length gave him a large empty purse, saying, “Sir, since you know how to make gold, you can have no need of anything but a purse to put it in.”

POLITENESS.

A Polite Mayor.—­At the time when Queen Elizabeth was making one of her progresses through the kingdom, a mayor of Coventry, attended by a large cavalcade, went out to meet her Majesty, and usher her into the city with due formality.  On their return they passed through a wide brook, when Mr. Mayor’s horse several times attempted to drink, and each time his worship checked him; which the Queen observing, called out to him, “Mr. Mayor, let your horse drink, Mr. Mayor;” but the magistrate, bowing very low, modestly answered, “Nay, nay, may it please your Majesty’s horse to drink first.”

A French Mayor.—­A mayor of a small village in France, having occasion to give a passport to a distinguished personage in his neighbourhood who was blind of one eye, was in great embarrassment on coming to the description of his person.  Fearful of offending the great man, he adopted the following ingenious expedient of avoiding the mention of his deformity, and wrote “Black eyes—­one of which is absent.”