new things, little pieces all different, like I always
before been thinking was bad to be having, all go together
like, to make one good big feeling. You see, Melanctha,
it’s certainly like that you make me been seeing,
like I never know before any way there was of all
kinds of loving to come together to make one way really
truly lovely. I see that now, sometimes, the way
you certainly been teaching me, Melanctha, really,
and then I love you those times, Melanctha, like a
real religion, and then it comes over me all sudden,
I don’t know anything real about you Melanctha,
dear one, and then it comes over me sudden, perhaps
I certainly am wrong now, thinking all this way so
lovely, and not thinking now any more the old way I
always before was always thinking, about what was
the right way for me, to live regular and all the
colored people, and then I think, perhaps, Melanctha
you are really just a bad one, and I think, perhaps
I certainly am doing it so because I just am too anxious
to be just having all the time excitements, like I
don’t ever like really to be doing when I know
it, and then I always get so bad to you, Melanctha,
and I can’t help it with myself then, never,
for I want to be always right really in the ways,
I have to do them. I certainly do very badly
want to be right, Melanctha, the only way I know is
right Melanctha really, and I don’t know any
way, Melanctha, to find out really, whether my old
way, the way I always used to be thinking, or the new
way, you make so like a real religion to me sometimes,
Melanctha, which way certainly is the real right way
for me to be always thinking, and then I certainly
am awful good and sorry, Melanctha, I always give
you so much trouble, hurting you with the bad ways
I am acting. Can’t you help me to any way,
to make it all straight for me, Melanctha, so I know
right and real what it is I should be acting.
You see, Melanctha, I don’t want always to be
a coward with you, if I only could know certain what
was the right way for me to be acting. I certainly
am real sure, Melanctha, that would be the way I would
be acting, if I only knew it sure for certain now,
Melanctha. Can’t you help me any way to
find out real and true, Melanctha, dear one. I
certainly do badly want to know always, the way I should
be acting.”
“No, Jeff, dear, I certainly can’t help
you much in that kind of trouble you are always having.
All I can do now, Jeff, is to just keep certainly
with my believing you are good always, Jeff, and though
you certainly do hurt me bad, I always got strong
faith in you, Jeff, more in you certainly, than you
seem to be having in your acting to me, always so
bad, Jeff.”
“You certainly are very good to me, Melanctha,
dear one,” Jeff said, after a long, tender silence.
“You certainly are very good to me, Melanctha,
darling, and me so bad to you always, in my acting.
Do you love me good, and right, Melanctha, always?”
“Always and always, you be sure of that now
you have me. Oh you Jeff, you always be so stupid.”
“I certainly never can say now you ain’t
right, when you say that to me so, Melanctha,”
Jeff answered. “Oh, Jeff dear, I love you
always, you know that now, all right, for certain.
If you don’t know it right now, Jeff, really,
I prove it to you now, for good and always.”
And they lay there a long time in their loving, and
then Jeff began again with his happy free enjoying.