Counsel:  “Well—­er—­for being associated abroad with—­er—­a certain type of hotel synonymous with a disorderly house—­”

Vivie:  “Indeed?  Have you tried them?  My mother has managed the hotels of an English Company abroad till she retired altogether from the management some years ago.  It was a Company in which Sir George Crofts—­”

Judge, interposing:  “We need not go into that—­I think the Counsel for the prosecution is not entitled to ask such questions.”

Counsel:  “I submit, Me Lud, that it is germane to my case that the prisoner’s upbringing might have—­”

Vivie:  “I am quite willing to give you all the information I possess as to my upbringing.  My mother who has resided mainly at Brussels for many years preferred that I should be educated in England.  I was placed at well-known boarding schools till I was old enough to enter Newnham.  I passed as a Third Wrangler at Cambridge and then joined the firm of Fraser and Warren.  As you seem so interested in my relations, I might inform you that I have not many.  My mother’s sister, Mrs. Burstall, the widow of Canon Burstall, resides at Winchester; my grandfather, Lieutenant Warren, was killed in the Crimea—­or more likely died of neglected wounds owing to the shamefully misconducted, man-conducted Army Medical Service of those days.  My mother in early days was better known as Miss Kate Vavasour.  She was the intimate friend of a celebrated barrister who—­”

Judge, intervening:  “We have had enough of this discursive evidence which really does not bear on the case at all.  I must ask the prosecuting counsel to keep to the point and not waste the time of the court.”

Prosecuting Counsel (who has meantime received three or four energetic notes from his leader, begging him to remember his instructions and not to be an ass):  “Very good M’Lud.” (To Vivie) “Do you know Mr. David Vavasour Williams, a barrister?”

Vivie:  “I have heard of him.”

Counsel:  “Have you spoken of him as your cousin?”

Vivie:  “I may have done.  He is closely related to me.”

Counsel:  “I put it to you that you are David Williams, or at any rate that you have posed as being that person.”

Judge, interposing with a weary air:  “Who is David Williams?”

Counsel:  “Well—­er—­a member of the Bar—­well known in the criminal courts—­Shillito case—­”

Judge:  “Really?  I had not heard of him.  Proceed.”

Counsel (to Vivie):  “You heard my questions?”

Vivie:  “I have never posed as being other than what I am, a woman much interested in claiming the Parliamentary Franchise for Women; and I do not see what these questions have to do with my indictment, which is a charge of arson.  You introduce all manner of irrelevant matter—­”

Counsel:  “You decline to answer my questions?”