“One cannot help recalling the memory of Pooh-Bah, ’Lord High-Everything-Else’ of the Mikado of Japan. Who forgets the memorable scene between him and Ko-Ko, the Lord High Executioner, on an occasion of supreme importance?
Ko-Ko. Pooh-Bah, it seems that the festivities in connection with my approaching marriage must last a week. I should like to do it handsomely, and I want to consult you as to the amount I ought to spend upon them.
Pooh-Bah.
Certainly. In which of my capacities? As
First Lord of
the Treasury, Lord Chamberlain,
Attorney-General, Chancellor of the
Exchequer, Privy Purse,
or Private Secretary?
Ko-Ko. Suppose we say as Private Secretary.
Pooh-Bah.
Speaking as your Private Secretary, I should say that
as the city will have
to pay for it, don’t stint yourself; do it
well.
Ko-Ko. Exactly—as
the city will have to pay for it. That is your
advice?
Pooh-Bah.
As Private Secretary. Of course you will understand
that, as Chancellor
of the Exchequer, I am bound to see that due
economy is observed.
Ko-Ko. Oh,
but you said just now, ’Don’t stint yourself;
do it
well.’
Pooh-Bah. As Private Secretary.
Ko-Ko. And now you say that due economy must be observed.
Pooh-Bah. As Chancellor of the Exchequer.
Ko-Ko. I
see. Come over here where the Chancellor can’t
hear us.
(They cross stage.)
Now, as my Solicitor, how do you advise me to
deal with this difficulty?
Pooh-Bah.
Oh, as your Solicitor, I should have no hesitation
in
saying chance it.
Ko-Ko. Thank you (shaking his head); I will.
Pooh-Bah.
If it were not that, as Lord Chief Justice, I am bound
to see that the law
isn’t violated.
Ko-Ko. I
see. Come over here where the Chief Justice can’t
hear
us. (They cross the
stage.) Now, then, as First Lord of the
Treasury?