1.  Regarding, one day, in company with a humorous friend, a noble vessel of a somewhat novel construction sailing slowly out of port, he observed, “What a quantity of cold water somebody must have had down his back.”  In my innocence, I supposed that he alluded to the wet work of the artisans who had been building the vessel; but when I came to know him better, I found that this was the form of comment he always indulged in when contemplating any new and great work, and that his “somebody” was the designer of the vessel.

2.  My friend had carefully studied the art of discouragement, and there was a class of men whom he designated simply as “cold-water pourers.”  It was most amusing to hear him describe the lengthened sufferings of the man who first designed a wheel; of him who first built a boat; of the adventurous personage who first proposed the daring enterprise of using buttons, instead of fish bones, to fasten the scanty raiment of some savage tribe.

3.  Warming with his theme, he would become quite eloquent in describing the long career of discouragement which these rash men had brought upon themselves, and which he said, to his knowledge, must have shortened their lives.  He invented imaginary dialogues between the unfortunate inventor, say of the wheel, and his particular friend, some eminent cold-water pourer.  For, as he said, every man has some such friend, who fascinates him by fear, and to whom he confides his enterprises in order to hear the worst that can be said of them.

4.  The sayings of the chilling friend, probably, as he observed, ran thus:—­“We seem to have gone on very well for thousands of years without this rolling thing.  Your father carried burdens on his back.  The king is content to be borne on men’s shoulders.  The high priest is not too proud to do the same.  Indeed, I question whether it is not irreligious to attempt to shift from men’s shoulders their natural burdens.

5.  “Then, as to its succeeding,—­for my part, I see no chance of that.  How can it go up hill?  How often you have failed before in other fanciful things of the same nature!  Besides, you are losing your time; and the yams about your hut are only half planted.  You will be a beggar; and it is my duty, as a friend, to tell you so plainly.

6.  “There was Nang-chung:  what became of him?  We had found fire for ages, in a proper way, taking a proper time about it, by rubbing two sticks together.  He must needs strike out fire at once, with iron and flint; and did he die in his bed?  Our sacred lords saw the impiety of that proceeding, and very justly impaled the man who imitated heavenly powers.  And, even if you could succeed with this new and absurd rolling thing, the state would be ruined.  What would become of those who carry burdens on their backs?  Put aside the vain fancies of a childish mind, and finish the planting of your yams.”

7.  It is really very curious to observe how, even in modern times, the arts of discouragement prevail.  There are men whose sole pretense to wisdom consists in administering discouragement.  They are never at a loss.  They are equally ready to prophesy, with wonderful ingenuity, all possible varieties of misfortune to any enterprise that may be proposed; and when the thing is produced, and has met with some success, to find a flaw in it.