There he blows!  There he goes!  Would an amateur Whaler,
  Like WILHELM, that fine blend of Statesman and Sailor,
    Incline to the chase and the capture
  Of such a huge, wandering, wallopping whale,
  To whom “Troubling the waters” with blow-holes and tail
    Seems a source of such riotous rapture?

* * * * *

DUST AND HASHES.

SIR,—­When I first took my present house, I was advised to get a Sanitary Dust-bin, instead of the old brick one which existed in my back-yard.  One of the blessings predicted for my Sanitary Dust-bin, was, that it was “easily removable.”  I find this to be the case.  It has already been removed by some area-sneak, and as I have got rid of the old brick dust-bin, the Vestry threaten to prosecute me for creating a nuisance, because my dust is now placed in a corner under my front steps.  What am I to do?

AGGRIEVED HOUSEHOLDER.

SIR,—­I find that the law recently passed against tips to Dustmen is quite unknown—­at all events, to the Dustmen themselves.  My servants, I find, go on freely bribing these functionaries, to remove bones and vegetable refuse.  Their rate of tipping, as far as I can make out, is about a halfpenny per bone.  If I were now to enforce the law and forbid tips, I foresee that the Dustcarts would have pressing business elsewhere, and would visit me about once a month.  Then would follow a regime of “big, big, D.s”—­in the window—­which would be intolerable.  I prefer tipping to typhoid.

Yours long sufferingly, VICTIM OF THE VESTRIES.

SIR,—­The Vestry is quite right to insist on every house burning up its own odds and ends.  The true domestic motto is—­“Every kitchen its own crematorium.”  I do this habitually, out of public spirit.  It is true that a sickening odour permeates the house for an hour or two of every day, created by the combustion of dinner remnants; also that most of my family suffer from bad sore throats, which they attribute to this cause.  What of that?  The truly good Citizen will prefer to poison himself rather than his neighbours.

A CLERKENWELL CATO.

SIR,—­I recently purchased Dodger’s Digest of Dustbin Law, and recommend it to the perusal of every householder.  In the case of The Vestry of Shoreditch v. Grimes, Lord Justice SLUSH remarks—­“The Vestry complains that the Defendant’s bin was improperly covered; that, in fact, it was not under coverture.  To this the Defendant replies that his bin was void ab initio, as there was nothing in it.  Then the question arises whether the Defendant’s Cook was justified in tipping the Dustman into the empty bin, considering that the Legislature has distinctly forbidden tips of all kinds to Dustmen.  I am of opinion that the Cook was the Defendant’s agent, and that the rule of qui facit per alium facit per se applies here.  The Cook’s