ejectment upon another, though he can show his last quarter’s receipt—­he must attend temperance meetings, and make opposition electors too drunk to vote.  He must shake hands with his greatest enemy, and palm off upon him lasting proofs of friendship, and silver-paper hints which way to vote.  He must make flaming speeches about principle, puns about “interest,” and promises concerning everything, to everybody.  He must never give less than five pounds for being shorn by an honest and independent voter, who never shaves for less than two-pence—­nor under ten, for a four-and-ninepenny goss to an uncompromising hatter.  He must present ear-rings to wives, bracelets to daughters, and be continually broaching a hogshead for fathers, husbands, and brothers.  He must get up fancy balls, and give away fancy dresses to ladies whom he fancies—­especially if they fancy his candidate, and their husbands fancy them.  He must plan charities, organise mobs, causing free-schools to be knocked up, and opponents to be knocked down.  Finally, he must do all these acts, and spend all these sums purely for the good of his country; for, although a select committee of the house tries the validity of the election—­though they prove bribery, intimidation, and treating to everybody’s satisfaction, yet they always find out that the candidate has had nothing to do with it—­that the agent is not his agent, but has acted solely on patriotic grounds; by which he is often so completely a martyr, that he is, after all, actually prosecuted for bribery, by order of the very house which he has helped to fill, and by the very man (as a part of the parliament) he has himself returned.

That this great character might not be lost to posterity, we furnish our readers with the portrait of

[Illustration:  AN ELECTION AGENT.]

* * * * *

THE STATISTICAL SOCIETY.

This useful society will shortly publish its Report; and, though we have not seen it, we are enabled to guess with tolerable accuracy what will be the contents of it: 

In the first place, we shall be told the number of pins picked up in the course of the day, by a person walking over a space of fifteen miles round London, with the number of those not picked up; an estimate of the class of persons that have probably dropped them, with the use they were being put to when they actually fell; and how they have been applied afterwards.

The Report will also put the public in possession of the number of pot-boys employed in London; what is the average number of pots they carry out; and what is the gross weight of metal in the pots brought back again.  This interesting head will include a calculation of how much beer is consumed by children who are sent to fetch it in jugs; and what is the whole amount of malt liquor, the value of which reaches the producer’s pocket, while the mouth of the consumer, and not that of the party paying for it, receives the sole benefit.