Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, August 28, 1841 eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 59 pages of information about Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, August 28, 1841.

Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, August 28, 1841 eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 59 pages of information about Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, August 28, 1841.

“It’s a good scheme, but it won’t do; the likes of him never does anything he’s wanted to.  He’s the contrariest ould thief in Ireland!  I wish mama hadn’t got a party; we’d do well enough but for that.  Never mind, boys, I’ve got it.  There’s Mikey Brian, he’s the boy!

“What for?”

“To cut the hair of the whole of us.”

He can’t do it.”

“Can’t! wait, a-cushla, till I tell you, or, what’s better, show you.  Come now, you devils.  Look at the heels (Rasper’s and Scrub’s) of them ponies!  Did ever you see anything like them!—­look at the cutting there—­Tony Dowlan never had the knack o’ that tasty work in his dirty finger and thumb—­and who done that?  Why Mikey Brian—­didn’t I see him myself; and isn’t he the boy that can ‘bang Bannaker’ at anything!  Oh! he’ll cut us elegant!—­he’ll do the squad for a fi’penny—­and then, lads, there’s them five others will be just one a-piece to buy gut and flies!  Come on, you Hessians!”

No sooner proposed than acceded to—­off we set, for the eulogised
“Bannaker banging Mikey Brian.”

A stout, handsome boy he was—­rising four-and-twenty—­a fighting, kissing, rollicking, ball-playing, dancing vagabone, as you’d see in a day’s march—­such a fellow as you only meet in Ireland—­a bit of a gardener, a bit of a groom, a bit of a futboy, and a bit of a horse-docthor.

We reached the stables by the back way, and there, in his own peculiar loft, was Mikey Brian, brushing a somewhat faded livery, in which to wait upon the coming quality.

Bob stated the case, as far as the want of our locks’ curtailment went, but made no mention of the delay which occasioned our coming to Mikey; on the contrary, he attributed the preference solely to our conviction of his superior abilities, and the wish to give him a chance, as he felt convinced, if he had fair play, he’d be engaged miles round, instead of the hopping old shaver at Kells.

“I’m your man, Masther Robert.”

“Who’s first?”

“I am—­there’s the fi’penny—­that’s for the lot!”

“Good luck to you, sit down—­will you have the Currah thoro’bred-cut?”

“That’s the thing,” said Bob.

“Then, young gentlement, as there ain’t much room—­and if you do be all looking on, I’ll be bothered—­just come in one by one.”

Out we went, and, in an inconceivably short space, Bob emerged.

Mikey advising:  “Master Robert, dear, keep your hat on for the life of you, for fear of cowld.”  A few minutes finished us all.

“This is elegant,” said Bob.  “Mikey, it will be the making of you; but don’t say a word till you hear how they’ll praise you at dinner.”

“Mum!” said Mikey, and off we rushed.

I felt rather astonished at the ease with which my hat sat; while those of the rest appeared ready to fall over their noses.  Being in a hurry, this was passed over.  The second dinner-bell rang—­we bolted up for a brief ablution—­our hats were thrown into a corner, and, as if by one consent, all eyes were fixed upon each other’s heads!

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Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, August 28, 1841 from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.