PEEL.—­And I must say they’re quite worthy of you.

PUNCH.—­I know it; but read—­read Punch’s Cabinet.

PEEL (reads).—­“First Lord of the Treasury, and Chancellor of the
Exchequer—­the Wizard of the North.”

PUNCH.—­And, wizard as he is, he’ll have his work to do.  He, however, promises that every four-pound loaf shall henceforth go as far as eight, so that no alteration of the Corn Laws shall be necessary.  He furthermore promises to plant Blackheath and Government waste grounds with sugar-cane, and to raise the penny post stamp to fourpence, in so delicate a manner that nobody shall feel the extra expense.  As for the opposition, what will a man care for even the speeches of a Sibthorp—­who can catch any number of bullets, any weight of lead, in his teeth?  Go on.

PEEL.—­“First Lord of the Admiralty—­T.P.  Cooke.”

PUNCH.—­Is he not the very man?  Who knows more about the true interests of the navy?  Who has beaten so many Frenchmen?  Then think of his hornpipe—­the very shuffling for a minister.

PEEL.—­“Secretary for Foreign Affairs—­Gold dust Solomons.”

PUNCH.—­Show me a better man.  Consider the many dear relations he has abroad; and then his admirable knowledge of the rates of exchange?  Think of his crucible.  Why, he’d melt down all the crowns of Europe into a coffee service for our gracious Queen, and turn the Pope’s tiara into coral bells for the little Princess!  And I ask you if such feats ain’t the practical philosophy of all foreign policy?  Go on.

PEEL.—­“Lord Lieutenant of Ireland—­Henry Moreton Dyer.”

PUNCH.—­An admirable person.  As Ireland is the hotbed of all crimes, do we not want a Lord Lieutenant who shall be able to assess the true value of every indiscretion, from simple murder to compound larceny?  As every Irishman may in a few months be in prison, I want a Lord Lieutenant who shall be emphatically the prisoner’s friend.  Go on.

PEEL.—­“Secretary for Home Department—­George Robins.”

PUNCH.—­A man so intimately connected with the domestic affairs of the influential classes of the country.  Go on.

PEEL.—­“Lord Chancellor—­Mr. Dunn, barrister.”

PUNCH.—­As it appears to me, the best protector of rich heiresses and orphans.  Go on.

PEEL.—­“Secretary for the Colonies—­Money Moses.”

PUNCH.—­A man, you will allow, with a great stake, in fact, with all he has, in one of our colonial possessions.  Go on.

PEEL.—­“President of the Council—­Mrs. Fry.”

PUNCH.—­A lady whose individual respectability may give a convenient cloak to any policy.  Go on.

PEEL.—­“Secretary for Ireland—­Henry Moreton Dyer’s footman.”

PUNCH.—­On the venerable adage of “like master like man.”  Go on.

PEEL.—­“Lord Chamberlain—­The boy Jones.”