Genie is a misshapen dwarf, with a huge jolter-head like that of Boerhave on the Bridge,[278] his limbs and body marvellously shrunk and disproportioned.

“Sir Dwarf,” said I, undauntedly, “thy head is very large, and thy feet and limbs somewhat small in proportion.”

Genie.  “I have crammed my head, even to the overflowing, with knowledge; I have starved my limbs by disuse of exercise and denial of sustenance!”

Author.  “Can I acquire wisdom in thy solitary library?”

G.  “Thou mayest!”

A.  “On what conditions?”

G.  “Renounce all gross and fleshly pleasure, eat pulse and drink water, converse with none but the wise and learned, alive and dead!”

A.  “Why, this were to die in the cause of wisdom.”

G.  “If you desire to draw from our library only the advantage of seeming wise, you may have it consistent with all your favourite enjoyments!”

A.  “How much sleep?”

G.  “A Lapland night—­eight months out of the twelve!”

A.  “Enough for a dormouse, most generous Genius.—­A bottle of wine?”

G.  “Two, if you please; but you must not seem to care for them—­cigars in loads, whisky in lashings; but they must be taken with an air of contempt, a floccipaucinihilipilification of all that can gratify the outward man.”

A.  “I am about to ask you a serious question—­When you have stuffed your stomach, drunk your bottle, smoked your cigar, how are you to keep yourself awake?”

G.  “Either by cephalic snuff or castle-building!”

A. “Do you approve of castle-building as a frequent exercise?”

G. “Life were not life without it!

    ’Give me the joy that sickens not the heart,
    Give me the wealth that has no wings to fly.’”

A. “I reckon myself one of the best aerial architects now living, and nil me paenitet hujus.”

G. “Nec est cur te paeniteat; most of your novels have previously been subjects for airy castles.”

A. “You have me—­and moreover a man of imagination derives experience from such imaginary situations.  There are few situations in which I have not in fancy figured, and there are few, of course, which I am not previously prepared to take some part in.”

G. “True, but I am afraid your having fancied yourself victorious in many a fight would be of little use were you suddenly called to the field, and your personal infirmities and nervous agitations both rushing upon you and incapacitating you.”

A. “My nervous agitations!—­away with thee!  Down, down to Limbo and the burning lake!  False fiend, avoid!”

So there ends the tale,
With a hey, with a hoy,
So there ends the tale,

                    With a ho.