Mr. Badgerer, Q.C. I am afraid the Police Officers who are waiting outside to arrest our friend who has just left the box will also be denounced as “legal bullies.”  But after all one can’t cross-examine a rogue on rosewater principles.  And if we Barristers sometimes do make things rather rough for innocent Witnesses, by dragging out unpleasant incidents in their careers, or suggesting some that never occurred, by so acting we provide a powerful inducement to people to avoid having such unpleasant incidents to be dragged out.  And if the fear of cross-examination prevents actions being brought, it thereby also prevents would-be litigants ruining themselves in law expenses.  With submission, m’Lud, and if your Ludship pleases, I would say that we “legal bullies” are public benefactors in disguise.

The Judge. There’s something in what you say, Mr. BADGERER.  But the disguise need not be so complete as it is.  I suppose it’s a verdict for the Defendants? With costs, yes.  Gentlemen of the Jury, I can’t sufficiently express my sense of the nobility of your conduct in listening to the evidence as you have done—­though, of course, if you had not listened, I should have committed you all for contempt in double-quick time—­and you will now return a verdict for the Defendants.

    [Left sitting.

* * * * *

“THE TRAVELLING COMPANIONS.”—­No.  XXVI. next week.

* * * * *

[Illustration:  LEGAL IMPROVEMENTS.

ANOTHER SAVING.

DURING THE ADJOURNMENT, THEIR LORDSHIPS WILL ASSIST IN THE REFRESHMENT
DEPARTMENT.

Thirsty Attorney. “NOT TOO MUCH FROTH ON, MY LUD!”]

* * * * *

TO POLICE CONSTABLES SMEETH AND TAPPIN.

    [In endeavouring to capture a gang of burglars at Greenwich,
    these two constables were dreadfully battered.  But they kept
    up the pursuit until the ruffians were secured.]

  Your hand, Mr. TAPPIN, your hand, Mr. SMEETH. 
  To the men who protect us we offer no wreath. 
  They face for our sakes all the rogues and the brutes,
  Getting cracks from their bludgeons and kicks from their boots.

  They are battered and bruised, yet they never give in,
  And at last by good luck they may manage to win. 
  Then, their heads beaten in all through scorning to shirk,
  Scarred and seamed they return without fuss to their work.

  O pair of good-plucked ’uns, ye heroes in blue,
  As modest as brave, let us give you your due. 
  Though we cannot do much, we’ll do all that we can,
  Since our hearts throb with pride at the sight of a Man.

Mr. SMEETH you’re a man, Mr. TAPPIN’s another; Mr. Punch—­pray permit him—­henceforth is your brother.  We are proud of you both, and we’ll all of us cheer These Peelers from Greenwich who never knew fear.

* * * * *