“Admiral,—­Being, from various circumstances, aware that you take a warm and a praiseworthy interest in your nephew, Charles Holland, I venture to write to you concerning a matter in which your immediate and active co-operation with others may rescue him from a condition which will prove, if allowed to continue, very much to his detriment, and ultimate unhappiness.

“You are, then, hereby informed, that he, Charles Holland, has, much earlier than he ought to have done, returned to England, and that the object of his return is to contract a marriage into a family in every way objectionable, and with a girl who is highly objectionable.

“You, admiral, are his nearest and almost his only relative in the world; you are the guardian of his property, and, therefore, it becomes a duty on your part to interfere to save him from the ruinous consequences of a marriage, which is sure to bring ruin and distress upon himself and all who take an interest in his welfare.

“The family he wishes to marry into is named Bannerworth, and the young lady’s name is Flora Bannerworth.  When, however, I inform you that a vampyre is in that family, and that if he marries into it, he marries a vampyre, and will have vampyres for children, I trust I have said enough to warn you upon the subject, and to induce you to lose no time in repairing to the spot.

     “If you stop at the Nelson’s Arms at Uxotter, you will hear of
     me.  I can be sent for, when I will tell you more.

     “Yours, very obediently and humbly,

     “Josiah crinkles.”

     “P.S.  I enclose you Dr. Johnson’s definition of a vampyre, which
     is as follows: 

“Vampyre (a German blood-sucker)—­by which you perceive how many vampyres, from time immemorial, must have been well entertained at the expense of John Bull, at the court of St. James, where no thing hardly is to be met with but German blood-suckers.”

[Illustration]

* * * * *

The lawyer ceased to read, and the amazed look with which he glanced at the face of Admiral Bell would, under any other circumstances, have much amused him.  His mind, however, was by far too much engrossed with a consideration of the danger of Charles Holland, his nephew, to be amused at anything; so, when he found that the little lawyer said nothing, he bellowed out,—­

“Well, sir?”

“We—­we—­well,” said the attorney.

“I’ve sent for you, and here you are, and here I am, and here’s Jack Pringle.  What have you got to say?”

“Just this much,” said Mr. Crinkles, recovering himself a little, “just this much, sir, that I never saw that letter before in all my life.”

“You—­never—­saw—­it?”

“Never.”

“Didn’t you write it?”

“On my solemn word of honour, sir, I did not.”