way, and I thought so, too, and I thought you cared for me; but it was only that we were keeping up appearances, pretending to ourselves just for the sake of old times.  We don’t love each other now; you know it.  But I have never intentionally deceived you or tried to lead you on; when I told you I cared for you I really thought I did.  I meant to be sincere; I always thought so until this happened, and then when I saw how easily I could let you go, it only proved to me that I did not care for you as I thought I did.  It was wrong of me, I know, and I should have known my own mind before, but I didn’t, I didn’t.  You talk about Dolly Haight; but it is not Dolly Haight at all who has changed my affection for you.  I will be just as frank as I can with you, Van.  I may learn really to love Dolly Haight; I don’t know, I think perhaps I will, but it isn’t that I care for him just because I don’t care for you.  Can’t you see, it’s just as if I had never met you.  You know it’s very hard for me to say this to you, Van, and I suppose it’s all mixed up, but I can’t help it.  You don’t know how sorry I am, because we have been such old friends—­because I really did care for you as a friend; it’s a proof of it, that there is no other man in the world I could talk to like this.  I think, too, Van, that was the only way you cared for me, just as a good friend—­except perhaps at first, when we first knew each other.  You know yourself that is so.  We really haven’t loved each other at all for a long time, and now we have found it out before it was too late.  And even if everything were different, Van, don’t you know how it is with girls?  They really love the man who loves them the most.  Half the time they’re just in love with being loved.  That’s the way most girls love nowadays, and you know yourself, Van, that Dolly Haight really loves me more than you do.”  She gathered up her books and went on after a pause, straightening up, ready to go:  “If I should let myself think of what you have done, I feel—­as if—­as if—­why, dreadful—­I—­that I should hate you, loathe you; but I try not to do that.  I have been thinking it all over since the other night.  I shall always try to think of you at your best; I have tried to forget everything else, and in forgetting it I forgive you.  I can honestly say that,” she said, holding out her hand, “I forgive you, and you must forgive me because once, by deceiving myself, I deceived you, and made you think that I cared for you in that way when I didn’t.”  As their hands fell apart Turner faced him and added, with tears in her eyes:  “You know this must be good-bye for good.  You don’t know how it hurts me to tell you.  I know it looks as if I were deserting you when you were alone in the world and had most need of some one to influence you for the good.  But, Van, won’t you be better now?  Won’t you break from it all and be your own self again?  I have faith in you.  I believe it’s in you to become a great man and a good man.  It isn’t too late to begin all over again.  Just be your better self; live up to the best that’s in you; if not for your own sake, then for the sake of that other girl that’s coming into your life some time; that other girl who is good and sweet and pure, whom you will really, really love and who will really, really love you.”