A capital pose for a girl with dark lines under the eyes, is that of “the girl-with-a-past.”  These lines, which are mostly the result of liver, are commonly accepted as evidence of soul.  The dress should be sombre, trailing, and rather distraught:  there is a way of arranging a fichu which of itself suggests that the heart beneath it is blighted.  If you happen to possess a few ornaments which are not too expensive, distribute them among your girl-friends; say, in a repressed voice, that you do not care for such things any more.  Let it be known that there is one day in the year which you prefer to spend in complete solitude.  Have a special affection for one flower; occasionally allow your emotions to master you when you hear music.  The hair-ornament belongs exclusively to the lower middle-classes, but wear one article of jewellery, a souvenir, which either never opens or never comes off.  Smile sometimes, of course; but be careful to smile unnaturally.  On all festive occasions divide your time between your bedroom and the churchyard.

Both these types demand some personal attractions; if you have no personal attractions, you must fall back upon one of the philanthropical types.  The plainer you are, the more rigid will be your philanthropy.  Your object will be to disseminate in the homes of the poor some of the luxuries of the rich; and, on returning, to disseminate in the homes of the rich some of the diseases of the poor.  Everything about you must be flat; your hats, hair and heels must be flat; your denials must be particularly flat.  Always take your meals in your jacket and a hurry, never with the rest of your family; never have time to eat enough, but always have time to brag about it.

I cannot understand why any girl should object to the assumption of a pose; and yet a girl told me the other day that she preferred to be what she seemed to be.  She was an exceptional case; I disbelieved in her protestations that she was perfectly natural, and managed to get some opportunities for observation when she did not know that she was observed.  I must own that she was quite truthful; she also managed to get married—­suburban happiness and no position—­but, as I said, she was exceptional.  Personally, I feel sure that I should never have been married if I had seemed to be what I really was.  I cannot understand this desire to be natural—­it is so affected.

My correspondence this week is not very interesting.  In spite of my disclaimer last week, I have been asked several questions which are not connected with Sentiment and Propriety.  “BELLADONNA” asks my advice on rather a delicate case; she is almost engaged to a man, A., and her greatest friend is a girl, B. Happening, the other day, to open B.’s Diary by mistake for her own, she discovered that B. is also very much in love with A. What is “BELLADONNA” to do?  I think the most honourable course would be to report in her own Diary a statement by A. that he loathes B., and then leave the Diary where B. might mistake it for her own.  This is checkmate for B., because she cannot do anything nasty without thereby implying that she has read “BELLADONNA’s” Diary.