But before this fountain can be tasted, or any other spring reached, any source found, a heavy weight has to be lifted from the heart, an iron bar which holds it down and prevents it from arising in its strength.

The man who recognises the flow of sweetness from its source through Nature, through all forms of life, he has lifted this, he has raised himself into that state in which there is no bondage.  He knows that he is a part of the great whole, and it is this knowledge which is his heritage.  It is through the breaking asunder of the arbitrary bond which holds him to his personal centre that he comes of age and becomes ruler of his kingdom.  As he widens out, reaching by manifold experience along those lines which centre at the point where he stands embodied, he discovers that he has touch with all life, that he contains within himself the whole.  And then he has but to yield himself to the great force which we call good, to clasp it tightly with the grasp of his soul, and he is carried swiftly on to the great, wide waters of real living.  What are those waters?  In our present life we have but the shadow of the substance.  No man loves without satiety, no man drinks wine without return of thirst.  Hunger and longing darken the sky and make the earth unfriendly.  What we need is an earth that will bear living fruit, a sky that will be always full of light.  Needing this positively, we shall surely find it.

CHAPTER IV

THE MEANING OF PAIN

I

Look into the deep heart of life, whence pain comes to darken men’s lives.  She is always on the threshold, and behind her stands despair.

What are these two gaunt figures, and why are they permitted to be our constant followers?

It is we who permit them, we who order them, as we permit and order the action of our bodies; and we do so as unconsciously.  But by scientific experiment and investigation we have learned much about our physical life, and it would seem as if we can obtain at least as much result with regard to our inner life by adopting similar methods.

Pain arouses, softens, breaks, and destroys.  Regarded from a sufficiently removed standpoint, it appears as medicine, as a knife, as a weapon, as a poison, in turn.  It is an implement, a thing which is used, evidently.  What we desire to discover is, who is the user; what part of ourselves is it that demands the presence of this thing so hateful to the rest?

Medicine is used by the physician, the knife by the surgeon; but the weapon of destruction is used by the enemy, the hater.

Is it, then, that we do not only use means, or desire to use means, for the benefit of our souls, but that also we wage warfare within ourselves, and do battle in the inner sanctuary?  It would seem so; for it is certain that if man’s will relaxed with regard to it he would no longer retain life in that state in which pain exists.  Why does he desire his own hurt?