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COCKNEY CLASSICS.—­Of the Guildhall Loan Collection, Mr. Deputy HORA is the Chairman.  As a Deputy must be a representative officer—­except, perhaps, in the case of a “Depitty Sawbones,” vide Sam Weller—­the temporary motto of the Deputy’s Ward might well be, “Hora pro nobis.”

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[Illustration:  A NEW COMET.

["Mr. DENNING, whose name is well known as a comet-finder, discovered a small FAINT Comet on Friday, March 18, at Bishopton, Bristol.”—­ Times.]

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[Illustration:  HASTY!

Mary. “IF MISSUS DON’T WITHDRAW WHAT SHE HAS SAID TO ME, I SHALL LEAVE THE HOUSE!”

Thomas. “WHAT DID SHE SAY?”

Mary. “SHE SAID, ‘I GIVE YOU A MONTH’S NOTICE!’”]

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ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.

EXTRACTED FROM THE DIARY OF TOBY, M.P.

[Illustration:  Seymour-Keay.]

House of Commons, Monday.  March 28.—­Strange sight witnessed in House to-night.  Subject of Debate, Indian Council Bill; Benches nearly full.  Pup and dog, I’ve known the House for nineteen years, and never before saw the like.  Explanation not found in fact of CURZON making his maiden speech as Minister in charge of Bill, though that had some influence at outset.  Able speech it proved, our newest Minister having the great gift of lucidity.  It was later than that when House filled, nearly two hours later, for in meantime SCHWANN had delivered Address as long as the Ganges, and MACLEAN (who was waiting his turn to speak) says, nearly as muddy.

Curious how India seems to affect eminent orators, making them for the time pointless, dull, and above all, verbose.  Probably no subject other than India could unite such galaxy of born orators and debaters.  SWIFT MACNEILL, RICHARD TEMPLE, SAMUEL SMITH, OCTAVIUS MORGAN, JULIUS ’ANNIBAL PICTON and SEYMOUR-KEAY—­one followed the other as in a necklet of diamonds gem succeeds gem, till the wearied eyesight can scarce decide which is the more brilliant.  SEYMOUR-KEAY was, indeed, too much for the SPEAKER, who thrice called him to order, the last time with stern voice and threatening brow that made SEYMOUR tremble from the altitude of his boot-heels.

It was none of these who filled the House with Members listening intently to a speech on internal affairs of India, It was Mr. G. who performed the miracle.  No one expected to find him in this galley; being there, the banks were rapidly crowded with a throng lost in admiration of his strong, swift, graceful stroke.  Difficult to say which the most admirable, the lofty height, far above the littleness of Party conflict, from which he surveyed the topic, the charm of his language or the dexterity with which, without seeming to rebuke the follower who had moved the Amendment