As an unhappy wife, her dignity demands that she never show her disapproval of her husband, no matter how publicly he slights or outrages her.  If she has been so unfortunate as to have married a man not a gentleman, to draw attention to his behavior would put herself on his level.  If it comes actually to the point where she divorces him, she discusses her situation, naturally, with her parents or her brother or whoever are her nearest and wisest relatives, but she shuns publicity and avoids discussing her affairs with any one outside of her immediate family.  One can not too strongly censure the unspeakable vulgarity of the woman so unfortunate as to be obliged to go through divorce proceedings, who confides the private details of her life to reporters.

=THE HALL-MARK OF THE CLIMBER=

Nothing so blatantly proclaims a woman climber as the repetition of prominent names, the owners of which she must have struggled to know.  Otherwise, why so eagerly boast of the achievement?  Nobody cares whom she knows—­nobody that is, but a climber like herself.  To those who were born and who live, no matter how quietly, in the security of a perfectly good ledge above and away from the social ladder’s rungs, the evidence of one frantically climbing and trying to vaunt her exalted position is merely ludicrous.

All thoroughbred women, and men, are considerate of others less fortunately placed, especially of those in their employ.  One of the tests by which to distinguish between the woman of breeding and the woman merely of wealth, is to notice the way she speaks to dependents.  Queen Victoria’s duchesses, those great ladies of grand manner, were the very ones who, on entering the house of a close friend, said “How do you do, Hawkins?” to a butler; and to a sister duchess’s maid, “Good morning, Jenkins.”  A Maryland lady, still living on the estate granted to her family three generations before the Revolution, is quite as polite to her friends’ servants as to her friends themselves.  When you see a woman in silks and sables and diamonds speak to a little errand girl or a footman or a scullery maid as though they were the dirt under her feet, you may be sure of one thing; she hasn’t come a very long way from the ground herself.

CHAPTER XXX

CLUBS AND CLUB ETIQUETTE

A club, as every one knows, is merely an organization of people—­men or women or both—­who establish club rooms, in which they meet at specified times for specified purposes, or which they use casually and individually.  A club’s membership may be limited to a dozen or may include several thousands, and the procedure in joining a club may be easy or difficult, according to the type of club and the standing of the would-be member.