She never for one moment thinks of herself, but of the other people she is thrown with.  She is a person of sympathy always, and instantaneous discernment.  She is good tempered no matter what happens, and makes the most of everything as it comes.  At games she is a good loser, and a quiet winner.  She has a pleasant word, an amusing story, and agreeable comment for most occasions, but she is neither gushing nor fulsome.  She has merely acquired a habit, born of many years of arduous practise, of turning everything that looks like a dark cloud as quickly as possible for the glimmer of a silver lining.

She is as sympathetic to children as to older people; she cuts out wonderful paper dolls and soldier hats, always leisurely and easily as though it cost neither time nor effort.  She knows a hundred stories or games, every baby and every dog goes to her on sight, not because she has any especial talent, except that one she has cultivated, the talent of interest in everyone and everything except herself.  Few people know that there is such a talent or that it can be cultivated.

She has more than mere beauty; she has infinite charm, and she is so well born that she is charming to everyone.  Her manner to a duke who happens to be staying in the house is not a bit more courteous than her manner to the kitchen-maid whom she chances to meet in the kitchen gardens whither she has gone with the children to see the new kittens; as though new kittens were the apex of all delectability!

She always calls the servants by name; always says “How do you do” when she arrives, “Good morning” while there, and “Good-by” when she leaves.  And do they presume because of her “familiarity” when she remembers to ask after the parlor-maid’s mother and the butler’s baby?  They wait on her as they wait on no one else who comes to the house—­neither the Senator nor the Governor, nor his Grace of Overthere!

This ideal guest is an equally ideal hostess; the principle of both is the same.  A ready smile, a quick sympathy, a happy outlook, consideration for others, tenderness toward everything that is young or helpless, and forgetfulness of self, which is not far from the ideal of womankind.

=THE GUEST ON A PRIVATE CAR OR YACHT=

The sole difference between being a guest at a country house and a guest on a private car or a yacht, is that you put to a very severe test tour adaptability as a traveler.  You live in very close quarters with your host and hostess and fellow guests, and must therefore be particularly on your guard against being selfish or out of humor.  If you are on shore and don’t feel well, you can stay home; but off on a cruise, if you are ill you have to make the best of it, and a sea-sick person’s “best” is very bad indeed!  Therefore let it be hoped you are a good sailor.  If not, think very, very carefully before you embark!

CHAPTER XXVI