On the other hand, one must not confuse absent-mindedness, or a forgetful memory with an intentional “cut.”  Anyone who is preoccupied is apt to pass others without being aware of them, and without the least want of friendly regard.  Others who have bad memories forget even those by whom they were much attracted.  This does not excuse the bad memory, but it explains the seeming rudeness.

A “cut” is very different.  It is a direct stare of blank refusal, and is not only insulting to its victim but embarrassing to every witness.  Happily it is practically unknown in polite society.

CHAPTER V

ON THE STREET AND IN PUBLIC

=Walking on the street=

A gentleman, whether walking with two ladies or one, takes the curb side of the pavement.  He should never sandwich himself between them.

A young man walking with a young woman should be careful that his manner in no way draws attention to her or to himself.  Too devoted a manner is always conspicuous, and so is loud talking.  Under no circumstances should he take her arm, or grasp her by or above the elbow, and shove her here and there, unless, of course, to save her from being run over!  He should not walk along hitting things with his stick.  The small boy’s delight in drawing a stick along a picket fence should be curbed in the nursery!  And it is scarcely necessary to add that no gentleman walks along the street chewing gum or, if he is walking with a lady, puffing a cigar or cigarette.

All people in the streets, or anywhere in public, should be careful not to talk too loud.  They should especially avoid pronouncing people’s names, or making personal remarks that may attract passing attention or give a clue to themselves.

One should never call out a name in public, unless it is absolutely unavoidable.  A young girl who was separated from her friends in a baseball crowd had the presence of mind to put her hat on her parasol and lift it above the people surrounding her so that her friends might find her.

Do not attract attention to yourself in public.  This is one of the fundamental rules of good breeding.  Shun conspicuous manners, conspicuous clothes, a loud voice, staring at people, knocking into them, talking across anyone—­in a word do not attract attention to yourself.  Do not expose your private affairs, feelings or innermost thoughts in public.  You are knocking down the walls of your house when you do.

=Gentlemen and bundles=

Nearly all books on etiquette insist that a “gentleman must offer to carry a lady’s bundles.”  Bundles do not suggest a lady in the first place, and as for gentlemen and bundles!—­they don’t go together at all.  Very neat packages that could never without injury to their pride be designated as “bundles” are different.  Such, for instance, might be a square, smoothly wrapped box