The great ballroom success, first and foremost, dances well.  Almost always she is pretty.  Beauty counts enormously at a ball.  The girl who is beautiful and dances well is, of course, the ideal ballroom belle.  But—­this for encouragement—­these qualities can in a measure at least be acquired.  All things being more or less equal, the girl who dances best has the most partners.  Let a daughter of Venus or the heiress of Midas dance badly, and she might better stay at home.

To dance divinely is an immortal gift, but to dance well can (except in obstinate cases, as the advertisements say) be taught.  Let us suppose therefore, that she dances well, that she has a certain degree of looks, that she is fairly intelligent.  The next most important thing, after dancing well, is to be unafraid, and to look as though she were having a good time.  Conversational cleverness is of no account in a ballroom; some of the greatest belles ever known have been as stupid as sheep, but they have had happy dispositions and charming and un-self-conscious manners.  There is one thing every girl who would really be popular should learn, in fact, she must learn—­self-unconsciousness!  The best advice might be to follow somewhat the precepts of mental science and make herself believe that a good time exists in her own mind.  If she can become possessed with the idea that she is having a good time and look as though she were, the psychological effect is astonishing.

="CUTTING IN"=

When one of the “stags” standing in the doorway sees a girl dance past whom he wants to dance with, he darts forward, lays his hand on the shoulder of her partner, who relinquishes his place in favor of the newcomer, and a third in turn does the same to him.  Or, the one, who was first dancing with her, may “cut in on” the partner who took her from him, after she has danced once around the ballroom.  This seemingly far from polite maneuver, is considered correct behavior in best society in Boston, New York, Philadelphia, Buffalo, Pittsburgh, Chicago, San Francisco, and therefore most likely in all parts of America. (Not in London, nor on the Continent.)

At dances organized during the War in the canteens for soldiers and sailors on furlough, the men refused to “cut in” because they thought it was rude and undoubtedly it is, except that custom has made it acceptable.  If, however, it still seems “rude” to the young men of Othertown to “cut in,” then they should not do so.

=SITTING OUT DANCES=

On the other hand, if a girl is sitting in another room, or on the stairs with a man alone, a second one should not interrupt, or ask her to dance.  If she is sitting in a group, he can go up and ask her, “Don’t you want to dance some of this?” She then either smiles and says, “Not just now—­I am very tired,” or if she likes him, she may add, “Come and sit with us!”

To refuse to dance with one man and then immediately dance with another is an open affront to the first one—­excusable only if he was intoxicated or otherwise actually offensive so that the affront was both intentional and justifiable.  But under ordinary circumstances, if she is “dancing,” she must dance with everyone who asks her; if she is “not dancing,” she must not make exceptions.