At public balls when there is a grand march, ladies take gentlemen’s arms.

=DISTINCTION VANISHED WITH COTILLION=

The glittering display of tinsel satin favors that used to be the featured and gayest decoration of every ballroom, is gone; the cotillion leader, his hands full of “seat checks,” his manners a cross between those of Lord Chesterfield and a traffic policeman, is gone; and much of the distinction that used to be characteristic of the ballroom is gone with the cotillion.  There is no question that a cotillion was prettier to look at than a mob scene of dancers crowding each other for every few inches of progress.

The reason why cotillions were conducive to good manners was that people were on exhibition, where now they are unnoticed components of a general crowd.  When only a sixth, at most, of those in the room danced while others had nothing to do but watch them, it was only natural that those “on exhibition” should dance as well as they possibly could, and since their walking across the room and asking others to dance by “offering a favor” was also watched, grace of deportment and correct manners were not likely to deteriorate, either.

The cotillion was detested and finally banned by the majority who wanted to dance ceaselessly throughout the evening.  But it was of particular advantage to the very young girl who did not know many men, as well as to what might be called the helpless type.  Each young girl, if she had a partner, had a place where she belonged and where she sat throughout the evening.  And since no couple could dance longer than the few moments allowed by the “figure,” there was no chance of anyone’s being “stuck”; so that the average girl had a better chance of being asked to dance than now—­when, without programmes, and without cotillions, there is nothing to relieve the permanency of a young man’s attachment to an unknown young girl once he asks her to dance.

=THE ORDEAL BY BALLROOM=

Instead of being easier, it would seem that time makes it increasingly difficult for any but distinct successes to survive the ordeal by ballroom.  Years ago a debutante was supposed to flutter into society in the shadow of mamma’s protecting amplitude; to-day she is packed off by herself and with nothing to relieve her dependence upon whoever may come near her.  To liken a charming young girl in the prettiest of frocks to a spider is not very courteous; and yet the role of spider is what she is forced by the exigencies of ballroom etiquette to play.  She must catch a fly, meaning a trousered companion, so as not to be left in placarded disgrace; and having caught him she must hang on to him until another takes his place.

There should be drastic revision of ballroom customs.  There is a desperate need of what in local dancing classes was called the “Dump,” where without rudeness a gentleman could leave a lady as soon as they had finished dancing.