in their attention, to drift easily out of mind and recognition.  It is mortifyingly true; no one is so ignorantly indifferent to everything outside his or her own personal concern as the socially fashionable New Yorker, unless it is the Londoner!  The late Theodore Roosevelt was a brilliantly shining exception.  And, of course, and happily, there are other men and women like him in this.  But there are also enough of the snail-in-shell variety to give color to the very just resentment that those from other and more gracious cities hold against New Yorkers.

Everywhere else in the world (except London), the impulse of self-cultivation, if not the more generous ones of consideration and hospitality, induces people of good breeding to try and make the effort to find out what manner of mind, or experience, or talent, a stranger has; and to remember, at least out of courtesy, anyone for whose benefit a friend of theirs gave a dinner or luncheon.  To fashionable New York, however, luncheon was at one-thirty; at three there is something else occupying the moment—­that is all.

Nearly all people of the Atlantic Coast dislike general introductions, and present people to each other as little as possible.  In the West, however, people do not feel comfortable in a room full of strangers.  Whether or not to introduce people therefore becomes not merely a question of propriety, but of consideration for local custom.

=Never introduce unnecessarily=

The question as to when introductions should be made, or not made, is one of the most elusive points in the entire range of social knowledge.  “Whenever necessary to bridge an awkward situation,” is a definition that is exact enough, but not very helpful or clear.  The hostess who allows a guest to stand, awkward and unknown, in the middle of her drawing-room is no worse than she who pounces on every chance acquaintance and drags unwilling victims into forced recognition of each other, everywhere and on all occasions.  The fundamental rule never to introduce unnecessarily brings up the question: 

=Which are the necessary occasions?=

First, in order of importance, is the presentation of everyone to guests of honor, whether the “guests” are distinguished strangers for whom a dinner is given, or a bride and groom, or a debutante being introduced to society.  It is the height of rudeness for anyone to go to an entertainment given in honor of some one and fail to “meet” him. (Even though one’s memory is too feeble to remember him afterward!)

=Introductions at A dinner=

The host must always see that every gentleman either knows or is presented to the lady he is to “take in” to dinner, and also, if possible, to the one who is to sit at the other side of him.  If the latter introduction is overlooked, people sitting next each other at table nearly always introduce themselves.  A gentleman says, “How do you do, Mrs. Jones.  I am Arthur Robinson.”  Or showing her his place card, “I have to introduce myself, this is my name.”  Or the lady says first, “I am Mrs. Hunter Jones.”  And the man answers, “How do you do, Mrs. Jones, my name is Titherington Smith.”