The whole marriage question revolves about a single point: 

The man wants him a woman,—­a woman who shall be his and only his;

The woman wants her a head of a home.  And here again, and once again, we see the difference between the sexes:—­

The one thing that the man wants is:  a mate;

The one thing that a woman wants is:  a head and provider of a household.

The man’s thoughts never go beyond the woman;

The woman’s thoughts always and at once travel far beyond the man—­to the children, the household, the home.  This is great Nature’s inexorable law.  But little knows the woman, and less knows the man, that the nubile girl is merely obeying great Nature’s inexorable law.

What price woman pays for her high office! for in this implicit, unquestioning, and unconscious obedience to Nature she performs perhaps her highest function.  On all accounts, therefore, let us

Pity women!  They obey so faithfully great Nature’s law, and Nature so often plays them false—­so very false, and so very often.  Besides,

The woman who gives her hand without her heart finds in time that she has made a sorry bargain—­a sorrier bargain, perhaps, that the woman who gives her heart with out her hand.  For,

Passionately as a man desires a woman, the passionately-desired woman will in time discover that, unless she gives her heart with her hand, her gift suffers depreciation.  And

Unless a woman gives her heart, how can she give her aid?  Surely,

Unless a man’s armor is buckled on for the strife of life by feminine sympathy, the fight is apt to be a sorry one at best; since

A woman’s true business is to back her husband:  if she leaves him in the lurch, there is little hope for him.  For of a truth

The strongest man is handicapped in the struggle for existence unless he knows and feels that his wife is at his side—­not pushing him so much as leaning upon him.

(1)
    Ein Jungling leibt ein Madchen,
    Die hat einen Andern erwahlt;
    Der Andre leibt eine Andre,
    Und hat sich mit Dieser vermahlt. 
    Das Madchen heirathet aus Arger
    Den ersten, besten Mann,
    Der ihr in den Weg gelaufen;
    Der Jungling ist ubel dran. 
    Es ist alte Geschichte,
    Doch bleibt sie immer neu;
    Und wem sie just passieret,
    Dem bricht das Herz entzwei. 
  —­Buch der Lieder, 39.

* * *

To simulate passion for an hour is possible; to simulate a life-long love—­that is hard.  For

Love is a thing unique and unalterable (in spite of its various alloys); clip the coin, and it will not pass current.  For

Ideal matrimony is founded on a mono-metallic basis:  no amount of silver will be accepted for gold.  And yet,

How often M loves and N accepts the love!  Poor M!  Also (in the long run), poor N!