always was with Joshua Lirriper.  So at last my dear the Major lay in wait for Mr. Buffle, and it worrited me a good deal.  Mr. Buffle gives his rap of two sharp knocks one day and the Major bounces to the door.  “Collector has called for two quarters’ Assessed Taxes” says Mr. Buffle.  “They are ready for him” says the Major and brings him in here.  But on the way Mr. Buffle looks about him in his usual suspicious manner and the Major fires and asks him “Do you see a Ghost sir?” “No sir” says Mr. Buffle.  “Because I have before noticed you” says the Major “apparently looking for a spectre very hard beneath the roof of my respected friend.  When you find that supernatural agent, be so good as point him out sir.”  Mr. Buffle stares at the Major and then nods at me.  “Mrs. Lirriper sir” says the Major going off into a perfect steam and introducing me with his hand.  “Pleasure of knowing her” says Mr. Buffle.  “A—­hum!—­Jemmy Jackman sir!” says the Major introducing himself.  “Honour of knowing you by sight” says Mr. Buffle.  “Jemmy Jackman sir” says the Major wagging his head sideways in a sort of obstinate fury “presents to you his esteemed friend that lady Mrs. Emma Lirriper of Eighty-one Norfolk Street Strand London in the County of Middlesex in the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland.  Upon which occasion sir,” says the Major, “Jemmy Jackman takes your hat off.”  Mr. Buffle looks at his hat where the Major drops it on the floor, and he picks it up and puts it on again.  “Sir” says the Major very red and looking him full in the face “there are two quarters of the Gallantry Taxes due and the Collector has called.”  Upon which if you can believe my words my dear the Major drops Mr. Buffle’s hat off again.  “This—­” Mr. Buffle begins very angry with his pen in his mouth, when the Major steaming more and more says “Take your bit out sir!  Or by the whole infernal system of Taxation of this country and every individual figure in the National Debt, I’ll get upon your back and ride you like a horse!” which it’s my belief he would have done and even actually jerking his neat little legs ready for a spring as it was.  “This,” says Mr. Buffle without his pen “is an assault and I’ll have the law of you.”  “Sir” replies the Major “if you are a man of honour, your Collector of whatever may be due on the Honourable Assessment by applying to Major Jackman at the Parlours Mrs. Lirriper’s Lodgings, may obtain what he wants in full at any moment.”

When the Major glared at Mr. Buffle with those meaning words my dear I literally gasped for a teaspoonful of salvolatile in a wine-glass of water, and I says “Pray let it go no farther gentlemen I beg and beseech of you!” But the Major could be got to do nothing else but snort long after Mr. Buffle was gone, and the effect it had upon my whole mass of blood when on the next day of Mr. Buffle’s rounds the Major spruced himself up and went humming a tune up and down the street with one eye almost