In the American marriage relationship the woman makes the home and the man makes the fortune.  In some countries the wife is an active business partner.  This is notably true in France, among the Jews in Russia, and many immigrant races in the United States.  The wife may even take the leadership if her superiority clearly shows up.  Perhaps the American method works well enough in a majority of cases, but there are superior women yoked to inferior men who finally despair of their husband’s advancement, and who, as the phrase goes, ought to be “wearing the trousers” themselves.

Mrs. D.J., thirty-nine years old, married fourteen years, two children, had excellent health before marriage.  Her family, originally poor, had been characterized by great success.  Her brothers occupy important places in the business world and are wealthy.  One of her sisters is married to a man who is successful in law, and the other sister is an executive in a department store.

Before marriage Mrs. J. was in her brother’s business, and at the time of her marriage earned a comfortable salary.  She married a man who inherited a small business, and when they married she was enthusiastic over the prospects of this business.  But unfortunately her husband never followed her plans; he listened impatiently and went ahead in his own way.  As a result of his conservatism they had not advanced at all financially.  Though they were not poor as compared with the mass of people, they were poor as compared with her brothers and brother-in-law.

In addition to the exasperation over her husband’s attitude toward her counsel (which was approved by her brothers), she developed a disrespect for him, a feeling that he was to be a failure and a certain contempt crept into her attitude.  Against this she struggled, but as the time went on the feeling became almost too strong to be disguised and caused many quarrels.  It is probable that if her own brothers and sisters had not done so well her feeling toward her husband would not have reached the proportions it did, for she became envious of the good things they enjoyed and to a certain extent resented her sisters-in-law’s attitude toward her husband and herself as poor.  The part futile jealousy and envy play in life will not be underestimated by those who will candidly view their own feelings when they hear of the success of those who are near them.  One of the reasons that ostentation and bragging are in such disfavor is because of the unpleasant envy and jealousy they tend involuntarily to arouse.

With disrespect came a distaste for sexual relations, and here was a complicating factor of a decisive kind.  She developed a disgust that brought about hysterical symptoms and finally she took refuge in refusal to live as a wife.  This aroused her husband’s anger and suspicions; he accused her of infidelity and had her watched.  The disunion proceeded to the point of actual separation, and she then passed into an acute nervous condition, marked by fear, restlessness, sleeplessness, and fatigue.