Co. I don’t jeer you, I speak what I think.  Indeed I do not laugh, I speak my Mind.  I speak seriously.  I speak from my Heart.  I speak sincerely.  I speak the Truth.

Pa. So may your Cap stand always upon your Head, as you speak sincerely.  But do I stand loitering here, and make no haste Home to see how all Things go there?

Co. You’ll find a great many Things new.

Pa. I believe I shall; but I wish I may find all Things as I would have them.

Co. We may all wish so if we will, but never any Body found it so yet.

Pa. Our Rambles will do us both this Good, that we shall like Home the better for Time to come.

Co. I can’t tell that, for I have seen some that have play’d the same Game over and over again; if once this Infection seizes a Person he seldom gets rid of it.

OF A SOLDIER’S LIFE.

The ARGUMENT.

The wicked Life of Soldiers is here reprehended, and shewn to be very miserable:  That War is Confusion, and a Sink of all manner of Vices, in as much as in it there is no Distinction made betwixt Things sacred and profane.  The Hope of Plunder allures many to become Soldiers.  The Impieties of a Military Life are here laid open, by this Confession of a Soldier, that Youth may be put out of Conceit of going into the Army.

HANNO, THRASYMACHUS.

Hanno. How comes it about that you that went away a Mercury, come back a Vulcan?

Thr. What do you talk to me of your Mercuries and your Vulcans for?

Ha. Because you seem’d to be ready to fly when you went away, but you’re come limping Home.

Thr. I’m come back like a Soldier then.

Ha. You a Soldier, that would out-run a Stag if an Enemy were at your Heels.

Thr. The Hope of Booty made me valiant.

Ha. Well, have you brought Home a good Deal of Plunder then?

Thr. Empty Pockets.

Ha. Then you were the lighter for travelling.

Thr. But I was heavy loaden with Sin.

Ha. That’s heavy Luggage indeed, if the Prophet says right, who calls Sin Lead.

Thr. I have seen and had a Hand in more Villanies this Campaign than in the whole Course of my Life before.

Ha. How do you like a Soldier’s Life?

Thr. There is no Course of Life in the.  World more wicked or more wretched.

Ha. What then must be in the Minds of those People, that for the Sake of a little Money, and some out of Curiosity, make as much Haste to a Battel as to a Banquet?

Thr. In Truth, I can think no other but they are possess’d; for if the Devil were not in them they would never anticipate their Fate.