Mis. But then, how nasty are ye in your Rags and Kennels?

Ir. What do they signify to real Happiness.  Those Things you speak of are out of a Man.  We owe our Happiness to these Rags.

Mis. But I am afraid a good Part of your Happiness will fail you in a short Time.

Ir. How so?

Mis. Because I have heard a Talk in the Cities, that there will be a Law, that Mendicants shan’t be allow’d to stroll about at their Pleasure, but every City shall maintain its own Poor; and that they that are able shall be made to work.

Ir. What Reason have they for this?

Mis. Because they find great Rogueries committed under Pretence of Begging, and that there are great Inconveniencies arise to the Publick from your Order.

Ir. Ay, I have heard these Stones Time after Time, and they’ll bring it about when the Devil’s blind.

Mis. Perhaps sooner than you’d have it.

The FABULOUS FEAST.

The ARGUMENT.

The fabulous Feast contains various Stories and pleasant Tales. Maccus puts a Trick upon a Shoe-maker.  A Fruiterer is put upon about her Figs.  A very clever Cheat of a Priest, in relation to Money. Lewis the Eleventh, King of France, eats some of a Country-Man’s Turnips, and gives him 1000 Crowns for an extraordinary large one that he made a Present of to him.  A certain Man takes a Louse off of the King’s Garment, and the King gives him 40 Crowns for it.  The Courtiers are trick’d.  One asks for an Office, or some publick Employment.  To deny a Kindness presently, is to bestow a Benefit. Maximilian was very merciful to his Debtors.  An old Priest Cheats an Usurer. Anthony salutes one upon letting a Fart, saying the Backside was the cleanest Part of the Body.

     POLYMYTHUS, GELASINUS, EUTRAPELUS, ASTAEUS, PHILYTHLUS,
     PHILOGELOS, EUGLOTTUS, LEROCHARES, ADOLESCHES, LEVINUS.

Pol. As it is unfitting for a well order’d City to be without Laws and without a Governor; so neither ought a Feast to be without Orders and a President.

Ge. If I may speak for the rest, I like it very well.

Po. Soho, Sirrah! bring hither the Dice, the Matter shall be determin’d by their Votes; he shall be our President that Jupiter shall favour.  O brave! Eutrapelus has it, the fittest Man that could be chosen, if we had every individual Man of us thrown.  There is an usual Proverb, that has more Truth in’t than good Latin, Novus Rex nova Lex, New Lords new Laws.  Therefore, King, make thou Laws.