Xa. A Wife good even to an Excess.  I should sooner have sent him a Bundle of Nettles and Thorns, than furnish’d him with a fine Bed.

Eu. But hear the Conclusion of my Story; the Gentleman was so touch’d, seeing so much good Nature and Temper in his Wife, that he never after that violated her Bed, but solaced himself with her at Home.  I know you know Gilbert the Dutchman.

Xa. I know him.

Eu. He, you know, in the prime of his Age, marry’d a Gentlewoman well stricken in Years, and in a declining Age.

Xa. It may be he marry’d the Portion, and not the Woman.

Eu. So it was.  He having an Aversion to his Wife, was over Head and Ears in Love with a young Woman, with whom he us’d ever and anon to divert himself abroad.  He very seldom either din’d or supp’d at home.  What would you have done, if this had been your Case, Xantippe?

Xa. Why I would have torn his beloved Strumpet’s Headcloths off, and I would have wash’d him well with a Chamber-Pot, when he was going to her, that he might have gone thus perfum’d to his Entertainment.

Eu. But how much more prudently did this Gentlewoman behave herself.  She invited his Mistress home to her House, and treated her with all the Civility imaginable.  So she kept her Husband without any magical Charms.  And if at any Time he supp’d abroad with her, she sent them thither some Nicety or other, desiring them to be merry together.

Xa. As for me, I would sooner chuse to lose my Life than to be Bawd to my own Husband.

Eu. But in the mean Time, pray consider the Matter soberly and coolly.  Was not this much better, than if she had by her ill Temper totally alienated her Husband’s Affections from her, and spent her whole Life in quarrelling and brawling.

Xa. I believe, that of two Evils it was the least, but I could never have submitted to it.

Eu. I will add one more, and then I’ll have done with Examples.  A next Door Neighbour of ours is a very honest, good Man, but a little too subject to Passion.  One Day he beat his Wife, a Woman of commendable Prudence.  She immediately withdrew into a private Room, and there gave Vent to her Grief by Tears and Sighs.  Soon after upon some Occasion her Husband came into the Room, and found his Wife all in Tears.  What’s the Matter, says he, that you’re crying and sobbing like a Child?  To which she prudently reply’d, Why, says she, is it not much better to lament my Misfortune here, than if I should make a Bawling in the Street, as other Women do?  The Man’s Mind was so overcome and mollified by this Answer, so like a Wife, that giving her his Hand, he made a solemn Promise to his Wife, he would never lay his Hand upon her after, as long as he liv’d.  Nor did he ever do it.

Xa. I have obtain’d as much from my Husband, but by a different Conduct.