out:  either iniquity or ignorance in the quirks of the law shall [do the same] him:  certainly in the end his long lived heir shall expel him.  Now this field under the denomination of Umbrenus’, lately it was Ofellus’, the perpetual property of no man; for it turns to my use one while, and by and by to that of another.  Wherefore, live undaunted; and oppose gallant breasts against the strokes of adversity.

* * * * *

SATIRE III.

Damasippus, in a conversation with Horace, proves this paradox of the Stoic philosophy, that most men are actually mad.

You write so seldom, as not to call for parchment four times in the year, busied in reforming your writings, yet are you angry with yourself, that indulging in wine and sleep you produce nothing worthy to be the subject of conversation.  What will be the consequence?  But you took refuge here, it seems, at the very celebration of the Saturnalia, out of sobriety.  Dictate therefore something worthy of your promises; begin.  There is nothing.  The pens are found fault with to no purpose, and the harmless wall, which must have been built under the displeasure of gods and poets, suffers [to no end].  But you had the look of one that had threatened many and excellent things, when once your villa had received you, free from employment, under its warm roof.  To what purpose was it to stow Plato upon Menander?  Eupolis, Archilochus?  For what end did you bring abroad such companions?  What? are you setting about appeasing envy by deserting virtue?  Wretch, you will be despised.  That guilty Siren, Sloth, must be avoided; or whatever acquisitions you have made in the better part of your life, must with equanimity be given up.  May the gods and godnesses, O Damasippus, present you with a barber for your sound advice!  But by what means did you get so well acquainted with me?  Since all my fortunes were dissipated at the middle of the exchange, detached from all business of my own, I mind that of other people.  For formerly I used to take a delight in inquiring, in what vase the crafty Sisyphus might have washed his feet; what was carved in an unworkmanlike manner, and what more roughly cast than it ought to be; being a connoisseur, I offered a hundred thousand sesterces for such a statue; I was the only man who knew how to purchase gardens and fine seats to the best advantage:  whence the crowded ways gave me the surname of Mercurial.  I know it well; and am amazed at your being cured of that disorder.  Why a new disorder expelled the old one in a marvelous manner; as it is accustomed to do, when the pain of the afflicted side, or the head, is turned upon the stomach; as it is with a man in a lethargy, when he turns boxer, and attacks his physician.  As long as you do nothing like this, be it even as you please.  O my good friend, do not deceive yourself; you likewise are mad, and it is almost “fools all,”