Dere Mable eBook

Edward Streeter
This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 51 pages of information about Dere Mable.

Dere Mable eBook

Edward Streeter
This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 51 pages of information about Dere Mable.

Why is it that no matter how fussy a fello was when he wore a vest as soon as he begins to call a coat a blouze no one thinks he knows whats what.  If you got any old magazenes what was old before the war started send em to the soldiers.  They wont know the difference.  Some wimen sent our regiment the Baptist Review for three years back.  That aint right, Mable.  They give you candy that comes by the bale.  Then they come round an watch you eat it.  I bet if you walked into there place an watched them eat theyd raise an awful holler.  They make speeches to you that youd get your money back without askin up north.  They give you free movies thats so old they look as if they was taken in the rain.

It seems like feedin the hippo at the zoo, Mable.  It dont matter so much as long as theres lots of it.

Im goin into town tonite with a bunch to eat a swell dinner on a china plate.  All but Angus MacKenzie.  He eats all his dinners on me.  Im awful sick of eatin out of a tin fryin pan.  When you put food in it it folds up like a jacknife goin the wrong way.  It takes months to make a good mess kit eater.

We get our mess from some fellos what stands behind a counter.  One of them divides the coffee.  He does it by puttin half in your cup an half on your thumb.  The other fellos has big spoons.  I guess they are old Lacross players.  A big wad of food hits your plate splash an knocks it squee gee.  The other fello hits the other plate an knocks it the other way.  When you get it all its runnin out of one dish up your sleeve an out of the other back into the food pans.

Army food always runs.  Cooks love loose grub.  There awful stupid.  If theres anything solid you get it in the pan with the rim on it.  Then they pour the soup on your cover.

When you sit down half what you got left spills out on the table.  It isnt so bad now cause everything freezes about as soon as it hits.

[Illustration:  “ARMY FOOD ALWAYS RUNS”]

You ought to see us eat breakfast, Mable.  We got so many overcoats and things on that a fello dont get no elbow action.  Some fellos eats with there wool gloves.  That aint a good scheme though.  It makes things taste like eatin peaches with there skins on.

The fello that invented our eatin tables must have been a supply Sargent once.  All the seats is nailed to the table.  When you get a spoonful of loose food up some fello puts his foot in your lap and leaves a couple of pounds of mud there.  I just brush it off tho on the next fello.  Never complain.  Thats me all over.

Well Mable I got to shine my shoes now and go and eat offen china plates with a nigger waiter.  I dont eat with a nigger waiter, Mable.  Its awful hard to explain things to you sometimes.  So now I will close.

     Hoping you are the same
          Bill

Dere Mable:

I been thinkin of you a lot durin the last weak, Mable, havin nothin else to do.  I been in the hospital with the Bronxitis.  I guess I caught it from Joe Loomis.  He comes from there.  Id have rote you in bed but I dropped my fountin pen on the floor an bent it.  Im all right now.

Copyrights
Project Gutenberg
Dere Mable from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.