MY FIRST WIFE.

My experience of my first wife, who will, I hope, live to be my last, is much as follows:  matrimony came from Paradise and leads to it.  I never was half so happy before I was a married man as I am now.  When you are married, your bliss begins.  I have no doubt that where there is much love there will be much to love, and where love is scant faults will be plentiful.  If there is only one good wife in England, I am the man who put the ring on her finger, and long may she wear it.  God bless the dear soul, if she can put up with me, she shall never be put down by me.

HINTS AS TO THRIVING.

Hard work is the grand secret of success.  Nothing but rags and poverty can come of idleness.  Elbow-grease is the only stuff to make gold with.  No sweat, no sweet.  He who would have the crow’s eggs must climb the tree.  Every man must build up his own fortune nowadays.  Shirt-sleeves rolled up lead on to best broad cloth; and he who is not ashamed of the apron will soon be able to do without it.  “Diligence is the mother of good luck,” as Poor Richard says; but “idleness is the devil’s bolster,” John Ploughman says.

Make as few changes as you can; trees often transplanted bear little fruit.  If you have difficulties in one place, you will have them in another; if you move because it is damp in the valley, you may find it cold on the hill.  Where will the ass go that he will not have to work?  Where can a cow live and not get milked?  Where will you find land without stones, or meat without bones?  Everywhere on earth men must eat bread in the sweat of their faces.  To fly from trouble men must have eagle’s wings.  Alteration is not always improvement, as the pigeon said when she got out of the net and into the pie.  There is a proper time for changing, and then mind you bestir yourself, for a sitting hen gets no barley; but do not be forever on the shift, for a rolling stone gathers no moss.  Stick-to-it is the conqueror.  He who can wait long enough will win.  This, that, and the other, any thing and every thing, all put together, make nothing in the end; but on one horse a man rides home in due season.  In one place the seed grows, in one nest the bird hatches its eggs, in one oven the bread bakes, in one river the fish lives.

Do not be above your business.  He who turns up his nose at his work quarrels with his bread and butter.  He is a poor smith who is afraid of his own sparks:  there’s some discomfort in all trades, except chimney-sweeping.  If sailors gave up going to sea because of the wet, if bakers left off baking because it is hot work, if ploughmen would not plough because of the cold, and tailors would not make our clothes for fear of pricking their fingers, what a pass we should come to!  Nonsense, my fine fellow, there’s no shame about any honest calling; don’t be afraid of soiling your hands, there’s plenty of soap to be had.  All trades are good to good traders.  A clever man can make money out of dirt.  Lucifer matches pay well, if you sell enough of them.