Carve. (Shakes his head.) I don’t think I should fancy it.

Janet.  I won’t say but what two guineas a week is a lot.

Carve.  And I was thinking how cheap it was.

Janet. (Staring.) Well, of course, if you’ve got money to fling about.

Carve.  Upon my soul I don’t know what money I have got.

Janet.  It’ll be just as well to find out before you get into the street.

Carve.  Let’s see.  Well, there’s seven pounds (showing it.) and this (pulling silver and gold from another pocket).  Not much is it?  Sixteen shillings and sixpence.  It’s true I’ve an annuity of eighty pounds.  I was forgetting that.

Janet. (Pleased.) Have you indeed?

Carve.  Yes.  But an annuity isn’t ready cash, is it?

Janet. (Picking up Shawn’s pocket-book.) And this?  This seems rather thick.

Carve.  I was forgetting that too. (Opens it and takes out many notes.)

Janet.  My word!  And you’d forgotten that!  You ought to see a doctor.

Carve. (Counting.) Twenty-one fives, and ten tens.  That makes two hundred and five pounds. (Half to himself.) I always knew I was a bad lot—­but where did I collar all that from? (To Janet.) I know what I shall do!  I shall go to the Grand Babylon.

Janet.  The Grand Babylon Hotel?  But it’s the dearest hotel in London.

Carve.  In the big towns we always went to the best hotel.  It’s cheapest in the end.

Janet.  You’re very persuasive, but you’ll never make me believe you’ll save money by staying at the Grand Babylon.

Carve. (Rising and beginning to collect things—­tries to fold up a pair of trousers.) Now, Mrs. Cannot, will you do me a favour?

Janet.  You’ll spoil these trousers.

Carve.  Will you come and lunch with me at the Grand Babylon to-morrow?

Janet.  But I’ve never been in such a place in my life.

Carve.  Remember.  You’re my only friend.  Will you come and lunch with me at the Grand Babylon to-morrow?

Janet. (Timidly.) I should like to. (Suddenly.) Here, give me those trousers, do! (She takes hold of one leg, carve retaining the other.)

     (Enter Cyrus carve.)

Cyrus.  Oh!

Curtain.

ACT II

SCENE I

Private sitting-room at the Grand Babylon Hotel, Strand.  Luxurious in the hotel manner.  Telephone.  Door, L., leading to corridor.  Door, R. (up stage), leading to bedroom.  Another door (not used) leading by a passage to bathroom.

Time.—­About noon on the following day.  Ilam carve and Janet are talking together.

Carve.  I’m really delighted to see you.